Pardon the Parody
by Lilly Maiden
Summary: Inuyasha and Miroku are the leaders of a gang of rapers. They are out searching for more girls when they run into Kagome. IK MS Don't judge a story by the summery. hint hint
1. Prophesey

Please read: This story is based off a dream I once had, with different characters, so if the characters somehow seem different in this story than in the original story... tough. And please read the entire thing through. If it still sucks after the first 3 chappies, you can give up on me as a hopeless cause.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Inuyasha characters though I would like too... The dream is mine... SO NO STEALING ANY OF MY DREAMS!!!  
  
Pardon the Parody  
  
It was your average day, hot, humid, and unbearable at home. Kagome had been sitting comfortably on her bed reading, when her mom suddenly charged in and ordered her to clean the house. Now, because she lived in a big house, this was no easy task. By the time Kagome had scrubbed the windows, vacuumed the house, cleaned her room, did all the dishes, and milked the cows, she was ready to collapse. Before her mom could think up some more work for her, she quickly called out,  
  
"Mom, I'm going for a walk!"  
  
"HOLD IT KAGOME! I'm taking your brother and your grandpa to visit a friend of mine that lives in the next town. We'll be gone for about 6 hours!" Her mom said in one quick breath.  
  
"Your lunch is in the fridge, and you'll have to make your own dinner. Take care of the house and be sure not to burn your bed like last time!"  
  
"...yes mom... and you didn't have to remind me..."  
  
"Don't lock yourself out either, you hear?!?!"  
  
"... ... YES MOM!!!"  
  
Kagome quickly grabbed the spare keys and rushed outside before her mom could change her mind.  
  
'I'll take a quick walk, and come back to do what I want to do for once.' She thought as she walked towards the park.  
  
It was a beautiful day outside, with golden sunlight flitting though the leaves. And despite the heat, there was a little breeze blowing and the trees provided shade. As she was walking, she noticed a group of about 5 boys arguing. Feeling in the helping mood, she walked over.  
  
"Do you guys need any help?" She asked.  
  
The leader had long silvery white hair with golden eyes. He looked at her and as his eyes traveled over her, lingering in places they shouldn't have, she shivered. Kagome backed away and then quickly turned around and ran away as fast as she could in the other direction. She didn't know why, but he scared her. Slowing down, she took a deep breath and began walking at a normal pace again.  
  
'Who was that guy?' Kagome wondered to herself.  
  
Looking up, she noticed that she was walking by a small creek. It was very peaceful and she sat down on sun warmed rocks. Gazing around her, she realized that she must be deeper in the woods than she had ever been. But in the cheerful sunlight, that didn't seem like such a problem. Kagome laid there for what seemed like forever until suddenly she heard voices. She sat up in a bolt. Looking around, she caught a flash of silver between the trees. It was him.  
  
Kagome jumped off the rock and sprinted for cover in the surrounding woodland. Heart beating, she leaned against the trunk of a massive oak.  
  
"I'm sure I saw someone here!" A dark haired guy called out.  
  
"Are you sure you're not losing it, Miroku?" The silver haired boy asked, smirking.  
  
"I AM NOT LOSING IT INUYASHA!!!! I SAW A GIRL ON THE ROCKS!!!"  
  
Inuyasha's ears perked up. "A girl? Do you remember what she looks like?"  
  
Miroku snorted, typical Inuyasha. Ignores everything I say but snaps to attention when I mention a girl.  
  
"Black hair, brown eyes, nice figure, ..."  
  
While Miroku was busy blabbing on, Inuyasha was lost in his own thoughts.  
  
'Is that the girl I saw earlier?' he mused.  
  
At that moment, the rest of the boys came out, dragging a blindfolded and gagged girl with them. She was pretty, with shoulder length brown hair.  
  
"Oy, lookie at what we found!" One of the boys called, breaking Miroku and Inuyasha's thoughts.  
  
"Wow, where'd you get this one?" Miroku asked.  
  
"Found her by the clearing."  
  
"Lets get back to the tree house. Come on Inuyasha."  
  
"You guys go on ahead. I'll catch up later."  
  
Miroku leaned over.  
  
"Inuyasha, resisting a girl for once? Is there something I need to know?" "...no..." Inuyasha replied giving Miroku a very weird look.  
  
"Are you sure? Perhaps you need to tell me you have secretly turned gay?"  
  
WHAM  
  
Miroku lay on the ground with a bloody nose. "I said too much didn't I?"  
  
"feh"  
  
Inuyasha began walking towards the trees. It took a few seconds before Kagome realized that he was walking right in her direction. Panicking, she quickly ran her options through her head. She could run, but he would probably catch her, considering the fact that she was a slow runner. On the other hand, she could stay where she was and desperately hope that he wouldn't see her, but that didn't seem likely either, seeing as he was walking straight towards her. Luckily at that moment, Miroku choose to call out,  
  
"Inuyasha, you know its going to rain soon right?"  
  
Inuyasha sweat dropped.  
  
"Uh, Miroku, you also know that there isn't a single cloud in the sky right?"  
  
"HUSH BOY!!! I AM PROPHESIZING!!!"  
  
Inuyasha: major sweatdrop  
  
Meanwhile, Kagome was running as fast as she could. She had turned and run as soon as Inuyasha's attention was back on Miroku and therefore, didn't hear his prophesy.  
  
'Why am I afraid of him?' Kagome asked herself. 'He hasn't done anything to me.'  
  
The more she thought about it, the angrier she got. 'He's got no right making me scared of him! That evil... evil.... DUCK!'  
  
Finally, when Kagome felt like her legs were about to fall off, she stopped and noticed two things. It was about to rain, clouds were racing across the sky. Second of all, she was lost. 'Curse this forest and whoever built it! Why is it so big?!?!?!' Fuming, Kagome yelled to the trees around her,  
  
"I HATE YOU INUYASHA!!!!!!!"  
  
Inuyasha, in the meantime was sniffing and running through the woods when he heard some one call his name. Sniffing some more, he came to the conclusion that it was her. Curious as to why she was calling him, he quickly followed her scent.  
  
AN: Yeah, I know Miroku is acting a bit...unusual, but like I stated earlier, MY DREAM!!!!! MWHAHAHAHA!!!! cough Anyway, I hope you guys who are reading this liked the first chapter. Feel free to flame me. I love flames. And hope to get some reviews too. hint hint 


	2. Burger

AN: He he he!!! I am back!!! In the previous chappie, I noticed I said milk the cows as one of her chores. That was not intended. I typed that with a friend over and forgot to erase it... -- That's was happens when you've got a ton of caffine in your system. Strange things happen. Also, this chapter and the third chapter will have a bit more silliness and the 4th chapter will have a lot more fluffy love!   
  
To all my wonderful people who reviewed, this chappie is for you! Yay-ness!  
  
DraGonMistress704-now you can see what happens next! Glad its weird and funny, cause that's the type of person I am!  
  
Safreil-hehehe, that's also my favorite line in the first chapter. I was in the prophesizing mood when I wrote it.  
  
Neko-Yuff16-I have updated! Very pleased you like it very pleased indeed!  
  
Yvonne-Inuyasha acting like Miroku? That wasn't intended, but it gives me ideas... lol!  
  
Sango's reincarnation-I WILL KILL HIM!!! MWHAHAHA!!!!!! cough let me rephrase that, I WILL KILL HIM AFTER THE STORY IS DONE!!!  
  
FireQueen-They will come soon enough... be patient young padawan. And 99.9% of a teddy bear in up coming chapters.  
  
Magicians of the Yami-I have no idea what you're talking about! I absolutely adore flames! ...no I don't...(but the world of ducks must not know!) ----------- Pardon the Parody  
  
Kagome sat down on the ground, hard. She had been wandering around for what felt like hours, though her evil watch assured her it was only 45 minutes.  
  
'How did this happen?' She moaned to herself. 'What happened to having a quick walk and then going home to do what I want for once?'  
  
At that moment, only one sentence came to Kagome's mind, and she struggled with whether to say it or not.  
  
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no! I won't say it, and nothing can make me say it!"  
  
After a few minutes of this, she gave up and uttered the dreaded phrase.  
  
"It can't get any worse can it?"  
  
Right on cue, it began to rain, hard. Kagome growled in frustration and pulled herself off the ground. She randomly picked a direction and began to walk.  
  
Inuyasha, by that time, was hot on the trail of the girl, when it began to rain. He quickened his pace, he hated to get wet.  
  
By the time Kagome reached some sort of land mark, she was drenched through the skin. She couldn't have been wetter if she jumped into a lake. In fact, here was a lake right in front of her. Seized by a sudden impulse, Kagome began to walk into the lake with the rain making ripples around her. Her skirt floated up around as waves tried to shove her over. She was nearing the center of the lake when one particularly large wave came and picked her up. Then and there, Kagome remembered too late that she couldn't swim.  
  
Inuyasha followed the scent of the girl right to the bank of the lake. By this time, it wasn't raining cats and dogs anymore, it was raining elephants, hippos, and blue whales.  
  
'Why the hell did she go swimming in this weather?' He wondered 'Did she escape from the lunatic asylum?'  
  
His eyes scanned the water as he looked for any sign of her. And then, he caught sight of it, a small glowing marble sized ball in the water. Inuyasha's eyes glinted with hopeful joy. It had to be a sea monster! The sea monster must have eaten the girl and before she went down, she pulled out on of its eyes! If he could kill the monster, that would be another evil deed he could write about in his diary. With that thought in mind, he dove into the water and quickly doggy paddled towards the glowing marble.  
  
As he swam closer though, it seemed less and less likely it was a sea monster. For one thing, it had a clumpy black thing that looked like seaweed attached to it. It also was wearing clothes. How many monsters do you see wearing clothes? Oh, yeah, it also happened the be the girl he was chasing.  
  
Inuyasha was getting upset. How dare this girl pretend to be a monster and get his hopes up! He grabbed her shirt with his teeth as he paddled back to shore. She had a lot of answering to do when she came back to conscious.  
  
When he finally reached the shore, he dumped her in a heap as he waited for her to come around. However, when Kagome didn't so much as twitch, he started to get worried.  
  
'Maybe I should take her back to the tree house.' Inuyasha thought.  
  
He carefully lifted her up so she was resting comfortably in his arms. Then he quickly half leaped, half ran back to the tree house.  
  
------- AN: Some of you might have a question about the tree house. It is a house in a tree, and yes Inuyasha and Miroku an the rest of their gang live in there. That's it for this Chapter!   
  
Just kiddingï¼ 


	3. Bones

AN: YES! WELECOME TO CHAPTER 3!!! Once again, much luv and thanx to all who have reviewed! I got 18 almost twice what I expected! I will give you all, giant burgers!

kk-I am a strange person…hopefully good too…

prettynutter-I will keep writing it until the very end, maybe make 5 million sequels…

wintergreen-You are too kind with your comments.

RavensFollower-Yes, Sango will definitely be coming, but first, I want Inuyasha and Kagome to like each other.

Neko-Yuff16-hehe! I am happy for your step-sister! It must be exciting to be an aunt! All the diapers and baby powder! Lol

baby-dreamer-I hate waiting too! And since I couldn't wait anymore, here's chapter 3.

LuVeNInuYasHa-I HAVE CONTINUED!!! That is also my favorite quote.

Taran-Wanderer-happy that you liked it, it makes my heart sing.

Addanc-TSC-Peace out too dude! v I have many friends who act like Miroku too.

DraGonMistress704-hmm…If I was a dark shadow, would I just ring the doorbell? Nah…

Ayame13-Its okay to sound like a teacher…sometimes… runs away in fear of Ayame's yard stick

inu-miko-angel-You are lucky reviewer 12! You get the Whooper!

Lilly Maiden (suize)-……--Don't use my account when you comment please…even if you are using my computer… Glad you liked Chapter 2 though.

Liz-Happy you loved the story. What part of the story do you not understand? I'm not sure how many chappies yet, but I will try to finish by the end of summer.

Kate-I prefer to keep my chapters short, and the entire story overall will probably have a lot of pages. I'll work on the details part though!

FireQueen-Here is chapter 3! Hope it was updated soon enough! As for the tree house, just imagine a house with all your modern conviences, only in a tree. Remember, this is from a dream I had and anything can happen in my dream!

Safreil-I know its unnerving, but it happened in a dream…And I try to go swimming in storms too!

Lenne23-Yay! You like the story! Here's chapter 3!

----------

Pardon the Parody

The sound of the doorbell echoed through the tree house. Inuyasha and Miroku pulled apart from the arm lock they were in. The two looked at each other. Inuyasha spoke first.

"You get it."

"THE ROOF!!! THE ROOF!!! ITS MADE OF BONES!!!"

Inuyasha: Very annoyed sweatdrop

"On second thought, I'll get it."

As he walked towards the door, he could hear Miroku following him, crying out, "BONES!!! BONES I TELL YOU!!!"

Inuyasha shook his head in exasperation. 'Why did I ever become friends with that fool?'

He reached the door and opened it.

------

Kagome was swimming in darkness. It was cold, so cold. Where was she? How did she get here? The last thing she remembered was sinking into the lake. Then, there was silver.

------

"MEOW" A kitten with three tails was sitting on the door step.

Inuyasha stared at the kitten and even Miroku had stopped yelling about bones to stare.

With a self satisfied twitch of her tails, she sauntered into the tree house and made her way up the stairs towards the bathroom, where Kagome was.

Inuyasha growled savagely and was about the leap after the kitten when Rin's voice came up the tree.

"INUYASHA! I'M HERE! PUT DOWN THE ACCURSED LADDER BEFORE I CAME UP THERE AND RIP YOUR EARS OFF!"

Miroku winced. "Dang Inu, better put down the ladder. Girl sounds like she's on PMS."

After Rin came up, she asked, "So what's the problem?"

Inuyasha pointed up stairs, and began to follow Rin up. When they reached the bathroom door, Inuyasha turned towards Miroku.

"I'm warning you, don't follow us, I will hurt you severely."

Miroku rolled his eyes. "Where have I heard that before?"

"I'm serious, why don't you go prophesize the end of the world or something."

Miroku, who had looked sad when he heard he couldn't come, suddenly cheered up and ran off to his room to prophesize to his stuffed animals.

Rin whistled when Inuyasha walked into the bathroom. She was staring at Kagome with a mixture of surprise and pity. "Where did you get this one, Inuyasha?"

"In the lake."

WHACK

Rin's hand flew into Inuyasha's cheek.

"DON'T LIE TO ME!"

"I'M NOT LYING!"

"OH COME ON! WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD GO SWIMMING IN A STORM?"

"WELL OBVIOUSLY SHE WOULD!"

"AND I'M SUPPOSED TO BELIEVE THAT LIE?"

"YES!!!"

Rin growled dangerously at Inuyasha. "I will continue this with you later, Inuyasha. Its easy to see this girl needs help, even if you didn't find her in a lake."

"Did too!"

A shampoo bottle came flying at Inuyasha as Rin yelled, "DID NOT! NOW GET OUT AND GET ME A CHANGE OF CLOTHES FOR HER!"

Inuyasha left to get a change of clothes, but not before saying "did too" one last time.

------

He was in a dark room. The rain and wind were pounding hard on his window, but he ignored them.

"Let us begin," his voice rang out.

Picking up the victim, he sliced its head off, and then laughing insanely, Miroku went to sleep.

---------

After being hit with 5 hair accessories, 3 toothbrushes, and a cow, Inuyasha and Rin, well, actually Rin, managed to get Kagome showered, dried, and changed. All that time, Kagome didn't awaken. Inuyasha was getting seriously worried. He had placed her body on his bed, and covered it with the blanket. Rin had left and he was now alone. After a few moments, Inuyasha yawned. He was tired, today had been a very busy day. Without thinking, he crawled into bed next to the girl and went to sleep.

In the darkness, Kagome felt warmth. She was cold, so cold, and she moved closer to the warmth. There, that was better. Her subconscious sighed and then, she left the darkness to fall into a blissful sleep.

-------

AN: Yeah, Mesa knows that it was a short chapter, but mesa's fingers are worn down to the bone. Curse you all for reviewing so much that I have to update so soon! We have learned some shocking things about Miroku, but don't worry, he's still going to be lovable. Rin in this story is the same age as Kagome. As for the kitten, I think you can all guess who that is. She will be making more appearances in future chapters.

BTW: Rin is the only girl alive for the MOMENT who can boss Inuyasha around.

I need you guys to answer three questions:

1. Should Sesshomaru be one of the characters in the story?

2. Do you think I should give Miroku an afro?

3. Should Inuyasha have normal human ears, or keep his doggy ears?

I say yes to all three, but I'm gonna ask the reader's opinion too.

If I get enough reviews, chapter 4 will be nice, long, and fluffy.

Same deal as last time guys, 10 reviews and you get the next chapter by the end the week. Now, I'm gonna get me a hot cup of latte and plan world domination.


	4. Sushi

AN: I have at last finished chapter 4. I can't believe I got over 30 reviews!!! I will thank the reviewers at the bottom of the page. I had to thank you guys so this chapter is coming out a bit earlier than I planned. This chapter is going to have a bit more fluff and a bit less silliness. We will also learn about Miroku's mysterious "victim" It's super long for my adoring peeps and reviewers.

Okay, I stated in the first chapter that you'd only have to read the first three chapters. If you don't like the fic, you can now give up on me as a hopeless cause… if not, I LOVE YOU TO DEATH!!!! HUGGLES!!!!

Dedicated to: RavensFollower, bittanybook, Neko-Yuff16, demonchik39, and inuchick06 for putting me on their favorite list... I FEEL SO LOVED!!!!!!!

-------

Pardon the Parody  
  
When Inuyasha woke up, it was still dark outside and the storm was still raging outside. He wasn't worried though. The tree was thick and strong, and it had survived through worse storms than this one. He knew lightning often struck trees, but he had lightning rods set up and besides, he had insurance. Looking down, he was surprised to see that Kagome was curled up in his arms with a smile on her face. Sighing in her sleep, she snuggled closer against his chest and fell back into deep sleep.  
  
Inuyasha smiled for the first time in 10 years. Not an evil smirk, or sneer, but a real genuine smile that lit his whole face up. Careful not to wake the sleeping angel in his arms, he got out of bed and went down to the kitchen.  
  
Yawning, he walked over to the fridge. Glancing at the clock, he noticed it was 7. Near dinner time. He wondered where the rest of the gang was, but then remembered that they were going out to pick up girls.  
  
'feh, how many girls can be out in this weather?' he thought.  
  
Inuyasha opened the fridge and pulled out a coke. Looking up, he noticed that Miroku was staring at him. He tossed his friend a coke too and the two buddies sat down together. One at the kitchen table and one on the counter.  
  
After a moment of silience, Miroku ventured to ask, "So, when are you going to take her?"  
  
Inuyasha started. He hadn't thought of that yet. When he had first found the girl, all he could think of was to protect her and make sure she was alright.  
  
"I don't know about this one Miroku. She's different for some reason, even though I can't really place my finger on it."  
  
Miroku nodded understandingly and the two once again fell into comfortable silence.  
  
'Inuyasha is finally opening his heart again. I thought he'd stay cold forever after her.' Miroku was broken out of his reverie when Inuyasha called him.  
  
"Miroku?"  
  
"hmm?"  
  
"I have a question."  
  
"Ask."  
  
"How did you find out about the girl?"  
  
"The spirits of fate whisper many things into my ears."  
  
sweatdrop  
  
"Miroku?"  
  
"hmm?"  
  
"I have one more question."  
  
"Ask."  
  
"Why is there a headless purple teddy bear in front of your door?"  
  
"he he... he"  
  
"Miroku..."  
  
"Well, you see, he's there because-"  
  
But why the teddy bear was where it was. Inuyasha never discovered because at that precise moment, a very loud thump was heard. Coming from Inuyasha's room. And Inuyasha knew that there was only one person in his room. He leapt off the counter and forgetting his coke, he ran up the stairs. Miroku, after a moment's hesitation, grabbed the butcher knife and followed Inuyasha.  
  
When Inuyasha first opened the door, he thought that his prisoner had escaped, because there was nothing on the bed, but after a few seconds, he noticed a small shaking shape huddled on the floor. Cautiously, he stepped closer. As he neared the shape, he realized it was the girl and she was huddled on the floor with a blanket wrapped around her. Inuyasha gently touched her shoulder.  
  
Kagome's head flew up in surprise. The first thing she saw was the boy from the park. The boy with the golden eyes, and behind him was... A BLACK HAIRED GUY WITH A SHARP KNIFE!!! Kagome gave a yelp of fear and huddled deeper into her blanket cave.  
  
'I knew they were cannibals!' Kagome thought. 'I wonder when they'll eat me and whether they'll boil me, fry me, or eat me like sushi.'  
  
At first, Inuyasha couldn't understand what the girl was doing. She had looked up or a moment, but then, she had suddenly yelped and buried herself in the blanket again. Looking behind him, he at last noticed Miroku and his butcher knife. Inuyasha mentally slapped himself. Why, oh why did he leave the knife out? He knew Miroku like shiny, sharp objects and he still left it out. Oh well, there was nothing he could do now. The poor girl probably thought they were cannibals and was no doubt wondering how they would eat her.  
  
"Miroku, go to your room."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because I said so."  
  
"I dun wanna!"  
  
"I'll throw your Hello Kitty collection away."  
  
"NOOOO!!!!! NOT HELLO KITTY!!!! I'M LEAVING!!!!" And with that, Miroku disappeared to his room to do what he did best, and what ever that is, Inuyasha didn't want to know.  
  
After Miroku had left the room, Inuyasha once again attempted to pick the girl up and place her on the bed. This time, he succeeded. The girl was surprisingly light and even with layers of blanket around her, Inuyasha could still fell her shivering. As soon as he set her on the bed, she curled into a small ball.  
  
Inuyasha sat a few feet away from her. He didn't want to scare her. The two sat in awkward silence for a few minutes, well, actually, he was the one doing the sitting. The girl still stayed in a ball. When Inuyasha couldn't bear the silence anymore, he ventured to ask,  
  
"So, what's your name?"  
  
The ball remained silent. Inuyasha was pretty sure the girl was asleep again, but he couldn't be positive, as her face was covered. After a few moments though,  
  
"Kagome"  
  
Inuyasha blinked. Was it his imagination, or did the ball just tell him it's name was Kagome? Nah, probably his imagination. But just in case,  
  
"So, ball, do you like cows?"  
  
Kagome flared. Who did this boy think he was? How dare he call her a ball after she just told him her name! Kagome immediately uncurled herself and flew at him.  
  
For Inuyasha, everything seemed like it happened in slow motion. First, the ball twitched, then it started to uncurl, and then finally, the girl appeared. As Inuyasha watched, her hand raised and then came at his face. All he could do was watch, like a really good movie, as the hand came closer and closer until finally,  
  
WHACK!  
  
Inuyasha blinked, and then felt his cheek burn with a stinging sort of pain. He blinked again and realized that the girl had just ...slapped him! No one had ever done that!!! No one! ...well, maybe Rin...  
  
"OY! WOMAN! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!?!?" Inuyasha howled at her.  
  
"WOMAN?!?!?!?!? MY NAME IS KAGOME!!! GET IT RIGHT!!! KA-GO-ME!!!! 3 SYLLABYES!!! IS THAT TOO HARD?!?!?"  
  
Inuyasha was surprised, but he quickly got under control. This girl would have to learn who was boss here. His natural reflexes took over as he pinned her to the bed. Kagome fought against his grip, but he was surprisingly strong. After a few moments, when it became obvious her efforts were useless, Kagome gave up and gave Inuyasha a very evil glare. In fact, if looks could kill, the one Kagome gave Inuyasha would have had him bouncing between heaven and hell for eons.  
  
Inuyasha grinned. He liked this girl. She was fun to annoy. An evil smirk came on his face as an evil idea entered his head. He leaned down, causing the distance between their faces to grow smaller.  
  
Kagome's eyes widened as she saw Inuyasha's face coming closer. As he was leaning in, she noticed at last that his ears weren't normal human ears. They were...dog ears. Kagome was overcome with a strong desire to pull them, but, being in the position she was in, that was quite impossible.  
  
Inuyasha's lips were right over Kagome's and then...  
  
------

AN: IT IS DONE!!! WHAT WILL HE DO??? OH, THE EVILNESS OF ME!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!! I'ma raise the challenge. 20 reviews and you get chapter 5  
  
The results from the poll is that yes, sessy should be in the story, miroku does not get an afro, and yes Inu keeps his doggy ears.  
  
Much thanx for all of my reviews.  
  
Addanc-TSC-Dude! Awesome! I love your review and you love my story!  
  
Wintergreen-Alright alright, I won't take away the doggy ears. .  
  
DraGonMistress704-I wanted to, but few people seem to agree.  
  
aska19-hmm, now there is an idea, I will add a twist in the story...hmm  
  
Yvonne-Hehe, mesa also thinks that his ears make him lookie cute!  
  
demonchik39-Yay! You love the story! AND I WILL HAVE FUN DOMINATING!!!  
  
Evil-ZukinI have updated soon for your reading pleasure!   
  
bittanybook-The updates are rolling! In fact, they are rolling so fast they will turn into green cheese.  
  
Sango's reincarnation-YES!!! FEEL THE INSANESS!!!! WATCH AS IT TAKES OVER YOUR MIND!!!!!  
  
kk-yesh, you're spelin is writ...dunno bout minee thuogh...  
  
inu's gurl13-I have written more!!! And it's a cool fic because I air condition it! .  
  
eros-jon-Lilly: Awesome stories come from awesome authors... Everyone else: Right...  
  
ACDCchicky-YES!!! YES I DO!!! AND I'M PROUD OF IT!!!! I HAVE A FETISH WITH COWS!!! LET THE WHOLE WORLD HEAR!!!!  
  
RavensFollower-Are you watching now? CAN YOU FEEL THE LOVE TONIGHT??? Yeah...hehe...  
  
xXLiLxPiNaYXx-okay, how did you know I was old (500 million years old) and a chap (gay cross dressing me)  
  
pinkjingling-he is keeping his ears...YAY!!!  
  
kagomehigurashi12-I had a friend draw Miroku with an afro...it does look horrible...  
  
bloodykitsune-DIE?!?! DIE?!?! I TELL YOU I AM INVINCIBLE!!! And I do use swords. Don't need shields cause I'm INVINCIBLE!!!  
  
Katy-Thank you for loving my story!! I wanna be loved too!!!  
  
Kirby-yay-ness!!! I like your review!!!  
  
Safreil-Yeah, I like Miroku the way he act in the story. At first, I was gonna make Sessy play the part of Miroku, but well, that was just too hard to see...  
  
Monica-YOU HAVE MORE!!!  
  
prettynutter-blinks innocently...well, this chapter was longer so does that make up for chapter 3?  
  
inuchick06-YEAH!!! THIS IS A GREAT STORY!!!  
  
Denise-The plot is 'original' because it comes from a dream!!! AND I DREAM ABOUT WERID STUFF!!! Lol! .

shinigami88220-Glad that it's a good story. I would be hurt of it was a bad one. Lol

loverofangelus73069-Um…I can't e-mail anyone at the moment because my e-mail thingy is down… sorry, but if you put me on author alert, it'll tell you when I update! And no, that wasn't Sango. She'll come in chapter 6 or 7.

Magicians of the Yami-Okay! I agree!!! He will be in the story!

Neko-Yuff16-WOW! 8 years!!! I wanna be an aunt, but...I still have a long, long, long way to go... sniffels...

Tasha3-Yay!!! I live to make people smile. Thank you for reading and reviewing!


	5. Pimple

AN: Yay, I'm back!!! finally done with chapter 5, and sorry for the delay. Comp crashed...I know, no more excuses. I love my reviews, at night, I hang them up like stars in my room, and they put me to sleep.

First, before you begin reading, please read this wonderful, and beautiful review from Ithilden.

"My gosh! Everytime you put down insane, rubbish, caplocked yelling, I wanted to scream "shut up!". I'm not saying this to be mean, but a proper writer shouldn't use caplocked sentences repeatedly. It gets extremely annoying for the reader. Also, many of those sentences were unneccessary and simply annoying to read. They didn't mean anything at all and the talk was extremely childish. I advise you to cut down on the amount of those pointless sentences, especially the ones in caplocks."

Lovely little thing isn't it? Now, who else agrees with what it states above? If you do… DON'T PUT IT ON MY REVIEW COLLECTION!!! YOUR REVIEW WILL DARKEN MY ROOM!!!

(can you tell I'm upset? This is what happens when you wake up at 5 in the morning to read reviews that call you a faulty author…)

This review, on the other hand, by HN-I-Love-Inuyasha is very reasonable and I respect it very much.

Um... hm... lets see... All I have to say is please don't wright anymore stories based on deams. It is origanal and all but it is just ay to wierd and confuzing. Try to cut down on the craziness a tad bit, and make it seem more believable. I do like it just having troubles following it. Keep writting, and use my suggestions if you want to... I will still read it if you don't! I am just so cunfused, I guess dreams are like that though.  
Anyway update  
Ja Ne  
HN

Can you see the difference? I will try out your advice, HN, but I don't think I will be very successful. I've already written 4 chapters that way, and it'll be hard to change, but I will keep it in mind for future stories! Thanx!

-------

Pardon the Parody

Inuyasha was a cell's length from Kagome, when he…burped. Right in her face. Right smack dab in front of her nose. He even had the nerve to blow the gas up her nostrils. Kagome was stunned. No, one, and she meant it, no one, had ever had the audacity to do such a thing to her. For quite a few minutes, which felt like it was stretched to hours, all Kagome could do was stare blankly at Inuyasha, her mind still trying to comprehend what he had just done.

And then, Inuyasha couldn't exactly tell when it began, but Kagome began to change. It started with her nose flaring, then erupted into into all out rage. Inuyasha was taken by surprise when she lunged at him. In fact, if it wasn't for the fact that he had her pinned down, he was sure his eyes would have been gone by now. As it was, she was fighting him with tooth and nail, and was no doubt going to get free of his grip soon.

"INUYASHA!!!"

Inuyasha winced. He was sure people 500 miles away could hear her. In one moment, he made a rash decision and released her wrists. While Kagome was caught up in the surprise of being released, he jumped out of the room and ran to Miroku's room.

Pounding on the door, Inuyasha screamed, "LET ME IN!!! THERE'S A RABID BALL AFTER ME!!!"

By the time Miroku opened the door, Inuyasha was sure he could hear the sound of pursuit behind him. He ran into Miroku's room and locked the door. Leaning against it, he panted while his ever sensitive ears twichted nervously.

Miroku waited a few seconds for Inuyasha to catch his breath before asking him what was wrong.

"Um…I burped…" was the hesitant reply.

Miroku, being in tune with the spirits of fate, immediately sensed there was more to it than his friend was willing to admit. But before he could question further, there came a huge bang on the door, as if someone was throwing their body into it.

"Wow, she didn't even bother with trying to see if the door was unlocked." Miroku noted amused.

"INUYASHA!!! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!!! I'LL GET YOU, AND WHEN I DO, I WILL DE-JELLY YOUR KNEES, AND SLAUGHTER YOU ALIVE!!!"

Miroku blinked appreciatively. "She has very creative threats doesn't she?"

Inuyasha hid behind Miroku, as the door groaned and a large crack appeared. Shivering in fear, he waited as the crack grew larger and larger. After the 14th thud, the door gave way, and though it came Kagome.

It was amazing how different she looked now. Her hair was a mess, and seemed alive. Her eyes were redder than hell's hottest flame, and her nails looked extremely sharp. Kagome didn't waste time on words. She just flew at him.

Miroku was watching Kagome's display with great amusement. It wasn't often that he got to see Inuyasha getting beat up by a girl. Then, he saw it.

Inuyasha flinched, as he prepared to get killed. After a few minutes, when his guts weren't being viciously ripped out, he ventured to look up. What he saw will stay with him till his dying day.

Kagome was lying on the ground, twitching, but not really moving. Miroku was standing over her with a very shiny, sharp needle in his hand.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO HER?" Inuyasha yelled.

Miroku blinked innocently. "I pricked her pressure point and paralyzed her."

"YOU WHAT?"

"uh..he..he he…he…"

"How did you know where her pressure point was?" Inuyasha asked suspiciously.

"I didn't. I just saw a pimple and I wanted to pop it."

Inuyasha: face vaults

"How long is she going to stay like this?"

"hmm…" Miroku stroked his chin softly. "I would say about a few hours."

"A few hours…" Inuyasha said thoughtfully. "Imagine all I could do to her a few hours."

"INUYASHA, I PROMISE ON MY COW THAT IF YOU SO MUCH AS LAY A HAND ON ME, I WILL RIP YOUR EARS OFF AND STUFF THEM UP YOUR NOSE!!!"

Inuyasha and Miroku looked up surprised.

"She can still talk?"

"Looks like it."

"Could you poke a pimple that was stop her mouth from moving?"

"Umm… I can't see any more pimples."

Inuyasha sighed, exasperatedly. "Well, I'll just have to duct tape her mouth shut."

Saying so, he threw her over his shoulder, and walked back to his room. Upon reaching the room, he laid her on the bed and sat next to her. For quite a while, he just stared at her, and she glared back at him. After a bit, when he felt like he couldn't stand any more of her laser vision glare, he decided to strike up a conversation.

"Why were you huddled on the floor?"

silence

"Do you like fish?"

silence

"What do you think of Miroku?"

"Werid, perverted, cross dressing maniac who destroys innocent teddy bears."

'She actually gave me a straight answer for once.' He thought, amused. 'And it's amazing how well she analyzed Miroku's personality.'

He was still curious about one thing she had said though.

"Why is he a cross dresser?"

"Because-" Kagome was cut off as a huge crash of thunder echoed through the sky.

She huddled into the blankets, as much as she could, being unable to move.

Inuyasha was caught unaware. He loved the thunder. It reminded him that even nature had a violent and dark side. However, it seemed like the girl was afraid of thunder. She was shivering and he was sure he could hear her heart thumping.

A little concerned, he covered it up the best he could.

"I can't believe a person as old as you is still afraid of thunder."

Inuyasha didn't get a reply, but he did hear a sniffling sound. He looked at Kagome in surprise. She was crying, and it was probably his fault for provoking her.

'Aw man,' he groaned inwardly. He usually could care less if anyone cried, but this girl's sniffling drove his conscience mad with guilt. Mentally slapping himself, he leaned down and did the first thing that came to his mind, he hugged her in a desperate attempt to calm her.

Kagome had her eyes squeezed shut. How could he be so mean? She was so upset that she couldn't think of any come back. Tears formed in her eyes as her cursed nose began to sniffle. Kagome was sure that Inuyasha was laughing at her, and didn't have the heart to open her eyes and see if her guess was correct.

The next thing she knew was that she was being pressed against someone's chest. She opened her eyes, but immediately closed them as another crash of thunder was heard.

Inuyasha felt the girl nearly ram her head into his chest as another bout of thunder passed. She began to drench the front of his shirt with tears. Even though he wasn't sure if he was comforting or not, he held on to her, feeling that it was the right thing to do.

After an hour or two, the storm was reduced to a light drizzle. Inuyasha carefully laid the girl gently against the pillows as he contemplated what to do. She had closed her eyes, and it seemed like she still couldn't move. If she could, he was sure she would have already 'de-jellyed his knees, and slaughtered him alive.'

'Girls are so complicated.' Inuyasha thought, mildly irritated. 'Why couldn't everybody just be a boy? Then we wouldn't have to go around worrying about feelings and other stuff.'

"On second thought, Miroku might turn gay, and I definitely don't want to see that." He said with grim sarcasm.

Inuyasha sighed. "I need to go talk to Rin…"

--------

AN: It is finished at last. Sorry if this chapter is crappy, but I forgot to drink coffee and I am trying to stop writing, "insane, rubbish, caplocked yelling" and to not cause people to "scream "shut up!"" because a "proper writer" doesn't write "unneccessary and simply annoying to read" stuff.

IMPORTANT!!! MUST READ!!! : Technically, this is where my dream ends. I, personally would like to continue the story, as I have a very good idea on how to thicken and develop the plot. However, I will only continue posting it up if the readers want it up. If you want me to continue, please review and tell me. If the story is continued, Sango will appear in the next chapter, and so MIGHT Sessy-chan.

Thanx again to my bright reviewing stars:

Addanc-TSC-Yay! SO glad you like the story and think its hilarious. P.S. I love your quote, it seems to work too!

prettynutterIntresting laugh… teehee, I'ma snatch it away and aution it off on Ebay! Lol

loverofSessanu-Here is the next chapter!

RavensFollower-YES!!! HELLO KITTY MUST DOMINATE!!! And ask Kagome for colorful threats!

twagirl-Yeah, I thought of making it dark, but I'm not that type of dark person. Maybe I'll write a Draco/Hermonie fic that's dark after this one, also based on a dream…

DraGonMistress704-Hehe, I'd let you have Miroku, but Sango will probably attack you with her boomerang! And IF the story continues, she will appear in the next chapter.

Fainus-Love your name…it sounds so poetic…AND THE PATTERN OF THE COWS MUST NOT BE BROKEN!!!

Bloodykitsune-You can try!!!! BUT YOU SHALL NOT SUCCEED!!! (I am an old hag, but I don't look like it because of the wonders of plastic surgery!)

ACDCchicky-Hehehe!!! You seem anxious for an update!!! Maybe I took long on purpose!!! I AM EVIL!!! (and I'm glad I'm still liked!)

demonchik39-Another anxious reviewer huh? Was the cliffie really that bad? And if I wanted to kill you, I would use subtle poison… Beware of what you eat!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!

KOGA'sgurl-Yay! My story is a drug, it secretly has nicotine in it, so you're now addicted!!! Smiles happily.

loverofangelus73069-Yeah, I know I'm evil, and I think that that was a good cliffie!

Safreil-Wow, I always love to read your reviews Safreil. (BTW, I also love your pen name. Sounds really cool!) They're always interesting and I love how you always tell me exactly what part of the story you liked!

InuyashaShowFanatic-Yes!!! FEEL THE EVILNESS!!! I'm am beyond the realm of happiness that you liked it!

Koneko8844-I shall do my best to keep up the good work, but I'm in depression mode right now… need to go to happy world and sing happy song… I AM BEAUTIFUL!!! NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY!!!! WORDS CAN'T, BRING ME DOWN!!!! OH NOOOO!!!! YES!!! I AM BEAUTIFUL!!! IN EVERY SINGLE WAY!!!! CAUSE- gets dragged off stage.

FireAngelWarrior-You should know that I rarely write the expected!!! I surprised you huh? Looks happy with herself. Anyway, I name the chapters by picking on word out of the entire chapter that I liked the best.

RenaeAurora- I WILL ROCK ON!!! And you will meet more of Inuyasha's gang later in the story. Trust me, this story doesn't even breach the borders of my insaneness!

Kill-all-Flamers-210-Hehe, gotta love your pen name…so true…so so terribly true… And I know the idea of rapists was a bit freaky, but I wanted to keep to the original story line of the dream. Don't worry though, they'll soon change!

Sexy Malik-I know I'm mean, but at least I told you!!! I could have never ever updated ever again! Nah, I love you guys too much to do that.

hah!-I don't want any of that stuff happening. That's why the rating is PG-13. Yeah, I agree that its gross…

pinkjingling-You think so? I heard something like it before, so I can't take all the credit, but I'm glad you can't stop laughing. Just think, you're making the world a better place!

MichelleAnneSummers-You have no idea how many reviews say that! Lol! I couldn't see any one else but him play that character though.

Sailor X-Nope, nothing is gonna happen, so it stays PG-13. Plus, I have no clue how to write a rated R story. O almost forgot the dream too, but I wrote it down in my dream diary!

Ktn-I'm gonna make you waut till the end of time!!!! MWahahahah!!! Just kidding!

RenaeAurora-Haunted with agony? Now there's an idea! And I know I'm cruel!!! (laughs diabolically)

crazy-inu-chick-Life is not fair my young padawan. Lol!

inuchick06-Almost every reader hated cliffies. And Sessy MIGHT come in the 6th chapter IF people want me to write it.

Kate-You will soon learn why he likes her. I want to keep up the pretense that he thinks she is annoying for a little longer!

Liz-Yay! The chapter feels loved!!!

Fire-Prinncess-051390-Yeah, I'm a werid person, and Sango will come in the next chapter IF people want me to continue writing.

Neko-Yuff16-Lol, yeah, kids are werid like that. They hate you at first, and end up loving you to death.

Liz-You did review, and nope, e-mail thingy not working, maybe because I'm using a Chinese computer, buy seeing how as I'm in China for the rest of the summer, I can't see a solution. I'm very happy to hear that my story is loved. It does my soul good!

Firequeen-You always seem to like the quotes that I do… ARE YOU MY EVIL TWIN SISTER??? Lol!


	6. Arms

AN: Well, my wonderful reviewers convinced me to continue writing, so here is Chapter 6. Not much else to say….

Many of you have been asking when Sango will appear. She will make her entrance in this chapter.

Dedicated: To everyone who reviewed and wanted the story to go on.

---------

Pardon the Parody

Kagome woke up to warm sunlight streaming through her blinds. She felt there was something wrapped around her, but she was still half asleep, and besides, it felt comfortable and good. As she slowly began to fully wake up, and her mind became clear, Kagome had the strangest feeling that arms were encircling her. Mhmmm…. Arms…. It felt really good…

WAIT!!!

Kagome suddenly shot up bolt upright. ARMS?!?!?

And then, it came.

"So… you finally decided to grace me with your pathetic appearance?" A cold, voice drawled.

Kagome spun around and saw Inuyasha lying on the bed with his eyes closed lazily and an evil smirk on his face.

"Y-you… you…. THING!!!" She screeched furious.

Inuyasha kept his eyes closed and let her ran on.

"You probably tried to seduce me in my sleep!!! You perverted cow!!!"

Inuyasha waited for her to take a breath, and then, almost as if he was till asleep,

"You know, you snore really loudly."

"I DO NOT SNORE!!!"

"…"

Inuyasha yawned, which infuriated Kagome all the more. Raising her hand, she brought it down full force at Inuyasha's cocky face.

Inuyasha knew that she was going to slap him. He knew it without even opening his eyes.

Kagome's connected with the soft sheets on the bed. It took a few moments for her mind to register what had happened. Just as she was about to hit him, the idiot rolled over onto his side. Kagome growled viciously and was about to slap him when he spoke again.

"Don't have a home to go to?"

HOME! Kagome cursed as she suddenly jumped up. She had forgotten. Mom, Souta, and Grandpa would be home by now! And they would wonder where she was! In fact, her mom might call the police and grandpa would began to perform rituals. And most of his rituals involved burning her bed.

The door was locked. Kagome spun around. In a tense, strained voice, she asked as politely as she could,

"Inuyasha, unlock this door right now… … … please!"

"Why…?"

Kagome gritted her teeth. She knew he would reply like that.

"Because I need to go home."

"I didn't give you permission."

"I DON'T NEED PERMISSION TO GO HOME!!!!"

"I caught you fair and square. You're my prisoner."

At this point, Kagome was banging her head on the door, quite literarily.

"My family will be worried."

"So?"

"I miss my family"

"And I care because…?"

"THEY NEED TO KNOW WHERE I AM!!!"

Kagome could feel tears coming to her eyes. Stupid tear glands! She sniffed, she couldn't take this anymore. She wanted to talk to her mom!

Inuyasha opened one eye a fraction of a milliliter. He was curious as to why she was remaining silent. Both of his eyes sprung open when he saw that she was on the verge of crying. Inwardly groaning, he squeezed his eyes shut as he tried his best to suppress the guilty feeling that was welling up. Why? Why did this always happen when she was around. It never happened when other people around him cry. The guilt only came when she cried.

Giving up, he growled to her.

"Get ready. I'll take you home, but as soon as we let them know you're alive, we're coming straight back! Understand?"

Kagome blinked. Had she heard right?

'I knew I should've de-waxed my ears last week.' She thought as she hurried to do as she was told.

After a few minutes, she and Inuyasha were speeding down the road to her home, Kagome leading the way, and Inuyasha sulkily following her.

Miroku sighed as he watched the two go down the road. He was alone in the tree house with nothing to do. Well, there was always decapitating more teddy bears that dare to challenge his authority, but that didn't exactly appeal to him right now. He decided to go for a walk in the park. He ate a quick breakfast, after a few moments of thinking, he also finished Inuyasha's and Kagome's breakfast that they'd forgotten.

'Today is Sunday, that mean's there's school tomorrow….' Miroku thought lazily.

"School… that means I need to get a new box of tissues…."

Saying so, he got up and went outside. Miroku squinted as the bright sunlight blinded him for a moment. When he could see decently, he headed down the street towards the tissue store. Half way there, Miroku noticed a V shaped boomerang lying on the side walk. Being the collecting person he was, he leaned down to pick it up and was immediately thrown on his back.

"THEIF!!! HOW DARE YOU TRY TO STEAL FROM ME!!!"

Miroku looked up and saw a girl with long black hair and pretty brown eyes. She also had a really nice derriere. Miroku could feel his hand twitching to grab it, but he controlled himself. For some strange reason, he had a feeling that this girl would really, really impair his body parts if he did anything.

The girl chunked the boomerang at his head, and with a huff, walked away.

Or… at least… tried to walk away.

Miroku could see she was leaving but he wanted to talk to this boomerang, Miroku murdering person. She could leave. He wouldn't let her! With that thought in his mind, he reached out and

… … …

--------

AN: MWAHAHAHA!!! ANOTHER CLIFFIE!!!! Sorry….mesa knows mesa is evil beyond all recognition. I have finally brought Sango in. More about her in the next chapter. Not as much funny…. I ran out of funny pills.

GIFT FOR ALL REVIEWERS!!!!!: I have made a present for you guys who review for me. I promised big burgers and hear they are! Go to my profile page and click on the home page thing… It'll take you to the burger! Tell me how you guys like it!

Thanks to reviewers (I got so many reviews encouraging me to go on!):

BloodyPoetry-I love the caps too… brings more emotion into the story!

Liz-I like your advice! And thanks for the compliment… it boosted my inner chi! Lol Yep, you reviewed twice!! I think the short term memory lose pill I snuck into your burger worked!

Kogagal101-I am going to continue to update! And the characters are pleased you like the story!

EbilJo-lol! I couldn't think what I wanted his victim to be, and then I came on the idea as I decapitated my own bear! (ops….I said that out loud didn't I?)

Fainus-Yeah! Cows rock this universe!!! And I'm ignoring flamers from now on!

Sakome-You have no idea how …unusual…my dreams are………

demonchik39-Did I mention I couldn't be killed? Mwahahaha!!! I like the idea of slow torture though… I shall begin stalking you!!! So BEWARE!!!

sakura star-hehe! Make me continue!!!! Nah! I'm kidding! Of course I'ma continue!

Kill-all-Flamers-210-Warn flamers.. now there's an idea… I should put a warning in the beginning of each story! And get Kagome to shout colorful insults!

Insane Puppy-Really happy its funny! I had funny pills when I wrote this! Lol

Kirei Baka Kasumi-Yeah, couldn't think of what to give him, so I just stuck with Hello Kitty!

Sugar-Crazy-Fox-I love my warped sense of humor. It makes me go cow happy at the most unusual times… (I'll leave it to your imagination…)

Amarina-I like things that are a little odd but good, don't you! (I'm listening to Hampster Dance right now!) lol

Anonymous Asian-Sure! Welecome to FF!!! Throws a party… And Be sure to let me know when the story is done! I'll read it!

Icys-I totally agree with you! Cows and decapitated teddy bears rock!!!! Let flamers go suffer at the bottom of the arctic ocean!

inuchick06-The puppy dog face worked! And Sango is definitely going to knock some sense into him. He does need major help!

prettynutter-Have no fear the ball shall always be here!!! (just for you, I'll let that be Kagome's nickname!)

InunBrittany-Yay! I'm so glad to hear what you said! Makes me sing for joy! Audience: Throws tomatos at Lilly

mYjesTikgiRl-Mesa is a strange person too… Mesa goes cow hunting with taking her math test!

PURPLE-DRAGON-IRIS-I AM A GAY CROSS DRESSER!!!!!! LET THE WHOLE WORLD HEAR ME!!! (hehe…ignore what I just wrote…)

max k.p-I am an evil genius who sits in my lab and plans world domination.

Aya Sadaka-LOL!!! I totally see how evil and cruel I'm being to him… (snickers privately)

fluffy-gurl-I can tell you had major sugar intake before reviewing huh? AND DONUTS ROCK THIS WORD!!!

crazy-inu-chick-Yes!!! I have at last obtained my own padawan!!! (laughs evilly) All the things I shall teach you!!!!

RavensFollower-aww…but I like your threats!!! No, switch that… I LOVE BEING THREATENED!!!

Lil kat-Thank you! I love intresting things, especially intresting edible things!!!

pinkjingling-Yes!!! Craziness is what makes the world go round!!! (and cows)

Inuyasha's-Sweetheart-Yay!!! For you, fluff shall be in the next chappie!!!!

Angel81-Glad the chapter was good!!! I feel good right now to!!!

JeweledKitsune79-yep…we know the trials of writing… we shall suffer quietly… OH THE PAIN!!!!

Neko-Yuff16-Hmm… haven't thought about that yet… but another factor is going to come bursting in just as they're about to get close.

XsangoX-I love to make people crack!!!! In fact, I even cracked my mom's antique vase!!!

Safreil-yeah, I have more reviews complimenting me! (whipers) Its okay… I love to name inanimate objects too!

DraGonMistress704-Yup…what is up with men and excess gas? You can have Miroku, but you'll have ta fight Sango!

Addanc-TSC-Peace out too dude! Yeah, the pimple part was my favorite!

loverofSesshanu-I HAVE GIVING MORE CHAPS!!! FEEL THE CHAPS!!! BE THE CHAPS!!! EAT THE CHAPS!!!!

bittanybook-You can try to hunt me down… But I shall use wedgie power!!!!!! Audience: ewwww…

InuAngel-Yeah!!!! I shall ignore evil flamers of doom.. and You've given me an idea the next chapter… (looks mysterious)

Nickie- Funny and cute! You gotta love that combination!!! And you can be a funny idiot in your next review!

MichelleAnneSummers-I have updated.. and don't let Kagome hear you quoting her. She'll come after you with all her rubber ducks!!!

tohru Honda-I made you wait for the next chapter anyway!!!! I'm so evil!!! Hehehe!! Kidding! I love all my reviewers!!!

Firequeen-Yeah, pressure point idea was from a friend… she told me that people had pressure points!!!


	7. Snowball I'ma die when he sees this!

AN: Yay! Mesa finally get chappie 7 up! Mesa has been very busy, so please be patient with mesa! Mesa still loves you all!!! This chappie has a bit of sess/rin, and well…That's all I'll say.

Dedicated to: Safreil , Neko-Yuff16 , FireQueen , Fainus for reviewing for every chapter! You will get a special burger as soon as I make one! And I'll e-mail it to you!

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Pardon the Parody

Rin looked around the cold sterile office. The walls were painted pure white, and the furnishings were simple, but elegant.

In the center of the room sat a tall, well defined man. Rin smiled when she saw him. Walking towards him, she wrapped her slim arms around his broad shoulders and buried her face in his soft, silky white hair.

"Hi Snowball!" Rin greeted him energetically.

'Snowball' took of his glass and turned to look at Rin. He slight smile appeared on his face as he saw who it was.

"Rin, I didn't expect to see you here this early. Is something wrong?"

Rin giggled. Sesshomaru was always cold and apathetic to others, but to her, he was her fluffy Snowball.

"Nope!" She replied happily. "I visited your brother today!"

"Oh?" Snowball looked mildly interested. "Anything special?"

"Yeah, Inuyasha found himself another girl. A really pretty one this time too!"

Sesshomaru sighed. "I really need to have a good long talk with that brother of mine. He's going to get into trouble with the law one day, and then I'll have to waste money and time."

Rin softly stroked Snowball's hair. That always got him to clam down.

"Snowball, give him some more time. I feel like this time something different will happen."

"…"

"Snowball…"

Sesshomaru groaned. He hated it when she used that nickname. It always made him feel…loved…

"We'll try it your way for a few weeks."

Rin's grew wider. She knew Snowball would eventually give in. Oh the power of love.

After a few moments of comfortable silence, Rin ventured to ask,

"So, what are you doing now?"

"…"

Rin frowned. He only pretended he couldn't hear her when he was really upset. A wicked smile came on her face as she leaned over his ear. She took a deep breath … … …

--------

Miroku reached out and grabbed Sango's tush as she tried to walk away. The next happened in such a blur, that later, all Miroku could recall was that it had felt nice, soft and warm.

Sango looked down worriedly at the blue haired boy lying down in front of her. She hadn't meant to bash him that hard with her boomerang. In fact, if you overlooked the pervert thing, he was actually kind of cute.

Sango mentally slapped her head.

'Get a grip on your self Sango! This guy is a thief, and grabs your butt and you admire his looks.' She mentally slapped herself.

Sango looked inside Miroku's pockets to try to find some id. All she found was 5 knives, 3 pieces of lint, a half eaten gum wrapper, and a cow. She huffed exasperatedly.

Then, she noticed it. There, on his hand.

--------

Inuyasha was murdering himself mentally as he followed Kagome to her home. Why, oh why did he let her go home? She'd probably grab a knife and hack at him if he made her go back to the tree house.

It was her tears that had forced him to let her go. Inuyasha didn't get it. What was so different about her tears? Tears were salty and wet. Her tears were also probably salty and wet.

Or were they?

Inuyasha was overcome with a sudden curiosity to see what Kagome's tears tasted like. He quickly leaned over and licked Kagome's cheek, where her tears had dried.

Kagome was happy to be going home. As soon as she went home, she planned to grab a knife and hack his ears to pieces until he gave up and returned to the tree house, without her. This comforting thought was in her head, when suddenly she felt something wet go over her cheek. She squealed, and spun around, ready to slap whatever monster that had dared to touch her. All she saw was Inuyasha looking calculating, as if deep in thought.

Inuyasha sampled the flavor, "Your tears ARE salty and wet!"

Kagome facevaulted. Growling, she began to walk towards her home again. She didn't know why she didn't slap him, she should. In fact, if it was anyone else, they would have had a hand print on their face.

While absorbed in these thoughts, Kagome was surprised to look up and see that they had already arrived at their home. Opening the door, she called out happily, (while moving towards the kitchen),

"Mom, Souta, Grampa, I'M HOME!!!"

--------

But before Rin could scream 'SNOWBALL' as loud as she could into his ear, Sesshomaru pulled her into his lap and covered her mouth with his hand. Rin struggled for a few seconds, but gave up. Snowball was stronger than her and she knew he would only let go if he felt like it, plus, it felt good sitting on his lap.

"He's coming."

Rin looked up at Snowball's face in surprise. Who was 'him'?

As if reading her thoughts, Sesshomaru continued,

"The CEO of our rival company and his son are going to come here for a business meeting."

Rin blinked.

"His son will be staying at a friend's house. In fact, he'll be staying with a former classmate, named Kagome."

He finally took his hand away from her mouth.

Rin inhaled deeply.

"So, why does it matter who his son is staying with?" She asked curiously.

Snowball mused over this question for a bit before answering.

"It doesn't……………or……at least……….I don't think it does."

--------

AN: Aha, three cliffies all at once!!!! AM I NOT JUST ASOLUTELY EVIL!!!!! If you want the next chap, give me at least 25 reviews! Also, no one told me if they liked their burger or not… You know, I went through a lot of trouble to make the burger…. Kinda depresses me if no one likes it…. (hint hint)

DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY QUESTIONS THEY WOULD LIKE TO ASK SNOWBALL?

I'm going to interview him, and if you have questions you'd like to ask him, tell me now!

Thanks to my reviewers!!!:

DraGonMistress704-……I have absolutely no clue about the tissue store thing… Just popped into my mind… As for the ghetto, well…its best if I don't say anything on that matter……

demonchik39-Is there really such a thing as spontaneous combustion? It would be cool if a person suddenly disappeared in a flash of flame…

Firequeen-Hehe, I put all that fluffy ness for you! How da ya like his nickname?

Fainus-You shall know what the reaction will be in the next chapter! Sorry for making you wait…but I wanted to thicken the plot in this chap! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!!!

Liz-NOOOO!!!! HOW DID YOU GET YOUR MEMORY BACK??? MORE PILLS!!! MORE PILLS!!!!

Lindsey-(glares at coco) OF COURSE I CAN DO BETTER!!!!! YOU'VE SEEN WHAT I CAN DO!!! (wink wink) AND MY STORIES ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE A SPECIAL ZING!!!!! (grabs mace, which she still hasn't paid Coco back for)

XsangoX- You know Sango will beat the crap out of Miroku! That's like a classic move!!! Oh how I love the great classics!

Saggitarius's-Finest-Lol! I did that once! I thought I had slept for a few minutes, but looked up and discovered it was already 20 years! And yes, the threats are copy write to yours truly!

Aya Sadaka-Oh yeah, you guessed correct. Miroku and butt grabbing is like a classic move……

crazy-inu-chick-Lol! Your reviews are funny! AND I HAVE UPDATED SOON!

Safreil-Yeah, at first, I wasn't sure what to make her grandpa burn, but my bed told me it wanted to be in the story, so…here it is…

MichelleAnneSummers-LOL!!! I can just see that on his tombstone, and it'll have a picture of him being slappe by Sango!

KOGA'sgurl-HEHEHE!!! I can't get tired of you! You're like a drug! I can't go without you!!! In fact, lets take over the universe!!! Yeah, I love my dreams, they add a bit of color into my life!

inuchick06-The puppy eyes worked! Here's more sessy loving for you!!!

xxxxxxxxxx-cool name! And its fun to kill people with curiosity, but it only works if your name has the letter has the letters, C, A, or T. Lol

InuAngel-YAY FOR SUGAR!!!! WANNA JOIN MY SUGAR CLUB?????

InuyashaShowFanatic-Yeah! The chappie is getting good!!! I love to hear that, makes me feel important!

NmareB4Xmas1223-Lol! Cows are like my idol! Make your friend spend a week with me, and whe to, shall honor the moo-ness of cows!!!

prettynutter-So glad to hear your review! I love all reviews, even if they just say good job! I AM GOING SUGAR HIGH!!!

Addanc-TSC-Hehe, have you noticed that in everyone of your reviews you said peace out dude? Lol! That's so funny and cool! Maybe I'll make Naraku a surfer dude!

Neko-Yuff16-Yeah, have you ever noticed that inanimate things usually have really long names? While real names are short… In fact, I'm gonna change my name… one day…

pinkjinglingYeah! COWS ROCK UNTIL THE END OF THE END OF TIME!!!! (did that make any sense?) AND SO DO FRYING PANS!!!! (why frying pans?)


	8. Lilly Maiden vs MrSnowball

AN: I know you guys were expecting chapter 8, but I decided to post the interview first. Chapter 8 will come up soon! Thanks a bunch to all my reviewers! You don't have to read this interview, but you can.

Hehe, you won't believe how different China is from America! I'm spending my summer here, and its already been 6 weeks! Yippee!!! (cheers enthusiastically) Though, I'M BEING FORCED TO SPEAK CHINESE!!! AHHH!!! Hehehe, I love it here though…

Anyway, we have a special guest appearance in the studio today! Everyone, please give a warm welcome to Mr……………SNOWBALL!!!

MS: (growls threatening) Don't call me that.

LM: (whines) But you let Rin call you that!!! How come I can't?

MS: Rin is special.

LM: I'm special too!

MS: (mutters under breath) Yeah, special ed.

LM: (tries to pretend she didn't hear) So, Snowball, what is it with your brother and cows?

MS: Don't call me that! And how am I supposed to know why Inuyasha has a fetish with cows?

LM: (taking a detective pose) Did he ever have any childhood incidents with cows?

MS: ……(werid look) No…, well, there was that one time… well, I shouldn't say it…

LM: Oh com–

MS: (laughing insanely)

Audience: (giving MS VERY strong looks)

MS: Oh, what the heck! He accidentally kissed a cow's derriere on a field trip, thinking it was his girlfriend.

LM: … … … and… just how old was he?... … …

MS: That's not all, the cow just happened to release gas when he kissed! (rolls of his seat laughing)

LM: … … …. (trying very hard not to laugh)

MS: (regains composure) Anyway, he was 4 at the time.

LM & Audience: O.O He had a girlfriend when he was 4?

MS: Nope

LM: Then… how…

MS: He had 13.

LM & Audience: 13!!!!!!!!!!

MS: (looking pleased with himself) I had 25 at his age.

LM: (face vaults painfully) What does Rin have to say about that?

MS: (suddenly looks nervous) She… didn't say anything…

LM: …uh-huh…

MS: (looks around studio nervously)

LM: Let's make sure, why don't we? OH RIN!!! WE NEED YOU TO ANSWER A QUEST—

MS: (suddenly covers LM's mouth) SHHHH!!!! Okay okay!!! She doesn't know yet!!!

LM: (dubious look) And…how long have you two been together?

MS: One

LM: One what? One day, one hour, one week, one minute, one month, one year, one what?

MS: One hundred years

Everyone: O.O;;;;

LM: (coughs) Uh…could you repeat that figure please?

MS: One hundred years.

LM: (sputtering) Okay, okay! I can understand you being 100 years old, being a demon and all, but what about Rin?

MS: (simply) I marked her.

LM: (confused)

MS: (sighs at LM's stupidity) I mated with her! Mixed my blood with hers! TURNED HER INTO A DEMON!!!!

LM: (suddenly gets it) Ohhhh….

MS: (bored) Can I go now? I only came because Rin forced me. She said I needed to make a more social appearance.

LM: (pulls out rubber mallet and growls menacingly) Not yet!!! You need to answer a few questions for your devoted fans out there!!! (bangs mallet onto table)

MS: (looking seriously freaked out) Why did I agree to do this? (mutters to self)

LM: (looks evil and ready to use mallet) WHAT WAS THAT?!?!?!?!?!

MS: (blinks and looks at mallet dangerously) I said sure not problem. I love to answer questions for anno—I mean, wonderful reviewers!

LM: (smiles to self) That's better. Now our first question is from demonchik39. She asks, "if you will mate with Rin when she gets older."

MS: (fuming) WHY DOES EVERYONE FREAKING BLODDY WANTS TO KNOW ABOUT MY PERSONAL LIFE?!?!?!?!?! YES, ME AND RIN ARE OFFICIAL!!!!! (burns a hole with his poison claws into the studio walls)

LM: (sweatdrop) You know you have to pay for that right? Okay…Anyway, Firequeen would like to know what the fluffy thing is you wear on your shoulder all the time.

MS: (growling) WHAT IS THE BLOODY PROBLEM???? ITS LONG OVER GROWN ARMPIT HAIR OKAY!?!??!? I KEEP FORGETING TO SHAVE, AND IT KEEPS ME WARM IN WINTER!!!!

LM & Audience: (silence)

MS: (blinks, suddenly realizes what he said out loud) Opps…

LM: (silence)

MS: (giggles, yes giggles to himself and runs out of the room)

LM: (silence)

Audience: (claps VERY weakly)

LM: (cough) Uhmmm… Well folks, you have just read another edition of Lilly's World of Cows! Next week, Lilly vs. Miroku!

------

AN: How do you guys like the interview? If you have any questions you want to ask Miroku, better do it now folks! I shall interview him next week! And remember, chapter 8 doesn't come out until I have AT LEAST 25 reviews for chapter 7.


	9. Indian

AN: Here is chapter 8. Really sorry about the delay, I went to Xi'an for 5 days. I tried to update before I left, but the site was in read only mode.

Dedicated to : Liz, and Tohru Honda for sending me my first two ever fanmail!!! I love you guys!

-------

Pardon the Parody

Sango couldn't believe her eyes when she saw what was on Miroku's hand. How dumb could an idiot get? Well, according to what she was looking at, very stupid. Miroku had writing on his hand in permanent marker:

To any females,

Will you please bear my child?

To any males:

I live in the tree house, the big one. If I am found unconscious, please put an ad in the papers asking females if they will bear my child.

Sango blew out her breath impatiently. Well, there was only one really 'big' tree house around here. She hauled him up by his hair and began to drag him there.

--------

Kagome was waiting for family members to rush upon her and smother her with love and questions. She waited, and waited. After a few minutes, she was still waiting. No one came. Momentarily confused, she was surprised when she heard her mom's voice.

"Kagome! Did you burn up the house??? Is that why you are ignoring my calls? Anyway, we have decided to stay fro a few weeks. Apparently, my friend has farm with many cows and other animals and invited us to stay for a while and learn about farm life. Be good and remember to change your underwear!"

Peeking into the hall, she saw Inuyasha staring at the answer machine blankly. Kagome groaned inwardly. He knew about her weird family and now…

"So ball, lets go back to the tree house now."

Kagome bristled. How many times did she have to tell him NOT to call her that? A few milliseconds later, she suddenly realized that she had forgotten the butcher knife in the kitchen. She quickly turned and started to walk back, desperately hoping Inuyasha wouldn't suspect anything suspicious. Too late.

A pair of arms wrapped themselves around her waist and stopped her in her tracks. A second later, she was thrown over Inuyasha's shoulder and being hauled out of her house.

"INUYASHA!!! PUT ME DOWN!!! I CAN WALK FOR MYSELF!!!"

"Feh! And let you splice my beautiful ears into pieces? Not on your life, ball!"

Groaning, she mentally whacked her self for forgetting her knife. How could she forget? So, here she was, going back to that dreaded place where the gay, cross-dressing, peverted cow lived.

In a few minutes, Kagome and Inuyasha arrived at the tree house, only to see a girl hauling an unconscious Miroku up the rope ladder. Inuyasha growled angrily, Miroku might be a bit…odd, but he was one of the few friends, he could bear to be with for more than 3 minutes. He was about to rush up the ladder, when he heard Kagome gasp. Turning around, he blinked when he saw Kagome looking at the girl laughing her head off.

"Sango! Is that you helping that perverted cow? Sango who said that she wouldn't let a guy touch her ever!" Kagome called up the ladder, grinning a million watt smile.

Sango looked down and grinned too, when she saw Kagome.

"Oy! Kagome! Is that you standing next to a premature old age guy?" She yelled back.

The two girls grinned. They were in the same boat. Kagome began to follow Sango up the ladder.

Inuyasha stared dumbly at the scene in front of him, and Miroku? Well, who knew if he was awake or asleep. But, Inuyasha could have sworn that he saw a smile appear as Miroku's hand crept toward Sango's butt.

In the tree house, the two girls, Inuyasha, and a still 'unconcious' Miorku were sprawled out on the bed. Technically, Kagome and Sango were on the bed, Inuyasha was on the chair glaring at Sango, and Miroku was hanging lopsidedly on the beanbag couch.

"Wow! Kagome how did you get here?" Sango asked excited.

"Eep! I was kidnapped by him!" She gestured towards Inuyasha.

The two girls carefully sneaked a peek at Inuyasha who had his eyes closed and was desperately trying to ignore the conversation, or at least act like he didn't care. His ears were suddenly pierced by a loud pitched squeal. He opened his eyes to see 4 hands grabbing at his ears.

"WHAT THE—"

"Wow!!! KAGOME HIS EARS ARE SO SOFT!!! ARE THEY REAL???"

"I'm not sure, give them a good yank and lets see!"

A second later, Inuyasha's ears, apart from being severely abused, were being yanked on. This was enough. If he had to endure a second more of this, this, this torture, he would jump off a cliff.

Growling menacingly, he stalked out of the room, but not before dragging Miroku out as well.

After the door was shut with a bang, Kagome turned to Sango and asked her to tell her part of the story, and the two friends fell into happy chatter.

Inuyasha, on the other hand, was grumbling and growling as he rested on Miroku's bed. He had thrown Miroku into the closet. Tons of questions were randomly going through his head. Who was that other girl? Why was she dragging Miroku up the ladder? WHY IS MIROKU UNCONCIOUS???

Ack, too many thoughts…brain…overload…need…to…reboot… Those were his last thoughts as he fell into blissful sleep.

-------

Rin waited patiently for Sesshomaru to finish him work. Being the CEO of a big and successful corporation took a lot of hard work. They were going to have dinner together, and then, Sesshomaru would take her to the new, and just opened amusement park. An idea suddenly struck Rin.

"Snowball?"

"Hmmm?"

"Can Inuyasha and that girl he found yesterday come with us? And maybe Miroku too."

Snowball looked up, surprised. This was quite an unusual request.

"Why do you want to do that Rin?"

Rin blinked, well, at least he didn't say no outright.

"Not to dinner with us, but can they come to the amusement park? I want to get to know them better."

"…"

"Snowball!!!"

Sesshomaru made the mistake in looking up. Rin had on her most desperate and always successful puppy dog look. Groaning, Snowball gave the only answer he could, while see that face.

"Sure."

--------

Inuyasha was awakened by the sound of the phone. He tried to get up, but his body felt so heavy. As he slowly awakened, he noticed a big blur of blue on him.

"GREAT ROARING COWS OF THUNDER!!!" He yelped as he realized what it was.

Miroku was sitting on his stomach, Indian style, and had his eyes closed. His fingers were poised, with the middle and the thumb touching.

Then, he moved, placing his index finger to his lips, and whispering,

"shush Inuyasha, lest you disturb the spirits that hover around us."

"GET THE BLOODY BLEEP OFF OF ME YOU BLEEP BLEEPITY BLEEP!"

Miroku sighed, before finally opening his eyes and rolling off.

"You better get the phone Inuyasha."

Inuyasha got off the bed and grumbling about cows and stupid cow spirits, he answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hello Inuyasha."

-------

AN: Yay! Another cliffie!!! I love cliffies don't you! Oh, sorry of this chap sucked. I've got a writer's block and I need to hack it apart. Also, I won't be able to update for at least a week. I'm going to Xian, and I can't take the lap top, so sorry about that.

Thanks to reviewers:

crazy-inu-chick-hehee, I'ma make them wait for the fluff. First, a few twists and pretzels

Liz-NOOOO!!!! HOW CAN YOU NOT REVIEW!!!!!

kogalover-Hey, if your girlfriend was crying because she's homesick, what do you do?

demonchik39-Yes! At least someone loves my burgers!

EbilJo-I love randomness, and sess and rin are a couple in this.

iamellaNOT-I know!!! I love to be evil and do evil things!!! Mwahahahaha!!!

Aya Sadaka-YEAH!!!! PENGUINS ROCK WITH COWS!!!! YAY!!!!

DraGonMistress704-Uh…good question…I have no clue. Maybe it's a really big pocket?

tohru Honda-I love ice cream!!!! ICE CREAM POWER!!!!

Saggitarius's-Finest-Oh yeah, insane genius are all over the place.

Safreil-Just seeing you name makes me smile! Put a smile on!

inuyashas girl-…was it that funny? AND I HAVE GIVEN YOU MORE!!!

Firequeen-You have seen what happens next.

Fainus-O.O Waoh! HOW did YOU know that?????? Yes, they are!!!!

Neko-Yuff16-Idea was inspired by a friend who drew a pic of him licking Kagome's face!

pinkjingling-Now that you mention it, frying pans are a great weapon. Goes to try it out on her cows

InuAngel-Hehe! I wanted a nickname that wasn't used before, so it would be absolutely original.

InuyashaShowFanatic-Yes!!! I totally agree. Evil is the best ever!!! Hope you're having fun camping.

KOGA'sgurl-Yeah! Great idea! Let me go and take over a radio or tv station right now!!! Much luv for you too!

Cherie-Of course!!! I want them to be nicer to each other too, but not…that nice…

Sakome-Yay! I appreciate what reviews I get! AND POWER TO THE COWS!!!

HunnyBunny-That's what my friends call me, insane. I don't think I'm insane at all!

Tasha3-Yup! Miroku has a cow in his pocket!!! And I have 20 cows!!!

RenaeAurora-My insane muse is ignoreing me for stealing her cow underwear, so its not to insane...


	10. Fro

AN: Here is Chapter 9! We will have some plot development, and some MAJOR fluff in the next chapter. Updates are gonna take a bit longer, cause I'm working on two stories now. If you like Harry Potter, check out my other story, Dark Fantasies.

Dedicated: TO DA MOOSE'S BUTT!!!!! MOSSY-POO!!!!!!!!!

---------

Pardon the Parody

"Hello Inuyasha"

Inuyasha's eyes widened.

"You!"

"Yes, Inuyasha. I'm coming back."

"Why?!"

"Why, I miss you of course. Can't I see my boyfriend?"

"EX-boyfriend" Inuyasha growled into the phone.

"tsk tsk. So cold. I'm coming back love, and you can't keep away from me."

"Watch me!"

"I've warned you, love. I will find you, and you are mine.

"No part of me belongs to you, you…"

"Bye love!"

click

Inuyasha stared at the phone with a furious look. How dare she! That witch! But a little part of his heart twitched. Ignoring the feeling, he threw the receiver back and stalked off to find Kagome.

Only to be interrupted by the phone ringing, once again. While quickly deciding between chucking the phone to the moon and answering it, he heard Kagome call out

"I'VE GOT IT!!!"

Wincing, he decided just to wait until she came down and told him who called.

He didn't have to wait long. A second later, Kagome, Sango, and … Miroku came running down into the room. Miroku wasted no time as he pounced on top of Inuyasha. Ignoring Miroku, Inuyasha shoved him off and stared at Kagome with a questioning look on his face.

Kagome took a deep breath before letting it all come out in one excited breath.

"Rininnvitedustogotothatawesomenewamusementparkthatjustopenedandissoveryveryverycool!!!!"

Inuyahsa blinked.

"Huh?"

Sango laughed and translated,

"Some person called Rin invited us, meaning you, Kagome, Miroku, and me to the new amusement park that just opened!!! The one with all the new rides!!! The one that Kagome and I have been wanting to go to for ages!!!"

Miroku leaned and hooked his arm around Sango's waist, as he said,

"Sango, my darling, if you want to go, then we shall go!"

Sango gave Miroku a weird look. And pried his fingers off her.

Kagome ignored both of them. Turning to Inuyasha, she screamed at him,

"Why are you still here? Go get ready!!! They'll be here any moment now!!!"

Inuyasha glared at Kagome.

"Slow down ball! What makes you think I'll agree to let you go? I know if Rin is going to be there, then so will Sesshomaru. And of Sesshomaru is going, then I'm definitely not going, and if I'm not going, neither are you!"

Kagome gaped at Inuyasha. Never had she heard such a bull headed excuse. And who the heck was Sesshomaru?

Giving him her best, Mr. Don't-Play-With-A-Pissed-Off-Girl-Who-Wants-To-Go-To-Amusement-Park look,

"I want to go Inuyasha! And if you don't let me go, I'll boil you alive in a lake of melted Barbies! See if I won't! My brother has enough of them!"

All the three other people in the room blinked. Inuyasha sighed. Well, when she put it that way, he didn't really have much of a choice, did he?

The group eventually picked themselves up off the floor, where they had all collapsed and went to get ready.

At exactly 7 o'clock, Sango heard a car pull into the driveway below the tree. The next minute, the door bell rang. Squealing happily, she turned to Miroku and did a facevault.

Miroku grinned. "Like my new look?"

Sango heaped up her courage and glanced up at him…Before letting her head fall back down to the floor.

Miroku was dressed in bellbottoms, with platform shoes on. He had mismatched socks, one with a purple back ground, and gold cows, and the other with with a blue background, and Barney printed on it.

His shirt was a Hawaiian shirt, with giant sprays of pink flowers on it, and around his neck was a long chain that had "Bling Bling Yall" carved on the pendant.

"And look at what happens if I push my nose ring!" Miroku told Sango happily.

Sango weakly lifted her head up as 'Barney has a lot of friends' filled the air. Miroku had on hot pink lipstick, a fake ear ring stud, an afro, and a nose ring with a …headless teddy bear at the end.

Groaning, Sango bashed herself for not seeing this coming. She knew what Miroku was like, of course he would do something like this. Too late now, there wasn't any time to get him fixed up. And if Sesshomaru was a grouchy as Inuyasha made him out to be, than he was no the type of person to wait paitiently.

At that moment, Kagome chose to burst in on them. She took one look at Miroku and went right back out the door.

"Great! Now Inuyasha will know too!" She grumbled to herself before dragging Miroku out.

When they reached Sesshomaru's limo, he took one look at Miroku and the first words he said were,

"No, not in my car!"

Sango moaned. How did this happen?

Luckily, Rin leaned over and whispered something into Sesshomaru's ear. After a few moments, Sesshomaru growled at Miroku,

"You can some, but lose the hair."

"NOO!!!! NOT MY FRO!!!! HOW CAN I BE A PROPER HIPPIE WITHOUT DA DO?"

sweatdrop

Sango gave Miroku a pleading look and he felt his insides turn to mush. This has never happened before. Miroku had never had his insides turned to mush before, especially by a girl. Guy, maybe yes, but not a girl. What ever Sango did to him though, it worked and Miroku relented. The wig came off, reveling he had dyed his hair hot pink. And then he pulled that wig off to revel his real hair.

Laughing, everyone got in the car and happily chatted away, getting to know each other better, as Snowball drove away.

-------

A male and a female got off the plane. The male turned to the female.

"Its been so long since I was last here, I'm surprised to see that almost nothing has changed."

"Yes," the female replied. "Everything is still the same."

-------

AN: I'M DONE AT LAST!!!! Yeah, crappy chap, but I'm really exhausted. My cuz woke me up at 4 in the morning to go jogging. She must be out of her mind…Anyway, like I said, read my HP story and review!

Note: Many asked when the Miroku interview is coming out. I'm waiting for 300 reviews, and will celebrate by airing the interview. Until then, keep the reviews coming, and feel free to ask Miroku questions!

Thanx to my wonderful reviewers!:

demonchik39-Yes! I will read Sanity! Promise! Just give me a bit. I'm exhausted and ready to collapse…

DraGonMistress704-My brain is tired too, but I'll take it as a compliment. I like compliments.

InuPuffball999-Glad you think that! Having fun is important, especially when reading!

InuyashaShowFanatic-Ugh…Writer's block sucks…My muse must hate me…I knew I shoulda given her happy pills.

InuAngel-hmmm I like suger high goddess.

FiReFaIrY14-O.O Wow! Talk about major cliffie hating! I didn't have a big cliffie this time! So love and adore me!!

aZn-DiViN3-bLeU-Hehe! I love how Miroku acts in my fic…He acts…different…hehehehe

Fainus-bleep bleepity bleep cows are the absolute best!

crazy-inu-chick-I will have lotsa fluff and pretzels in the next chapter! Garunteed! Just for you!!!

saber-kon-I LOVE INUYASHA'S EARS TOO!!! AND THEY ARE ALREADY STOLEN BY ME!!!

Kirei Baka Kasumi-Hehe! Thanks! You just gotta love Miroku…

Safreil-Oh yeah…Poor Sango. One just has to pity her with a person like Miroku…

RenaeAurora-You know, you can die laughing…That's how I would like to die…laughing…

Neko-Yuff16-I've updated soon! And don't roll on the floor, roll on the couch!!! Mwahahaha!!!

KOGA'sgurl-Big huh? How about mega big? And we can start with radio Disney!!!!!

Prepare For I Am The Sugar Kitten-Lol! I love your nickname! So long and creative. I will be waiting for more reviews from you, Prepare For I Am The Sugar Kitten!

Eternalhappiness-Yay! I've updated soon!!!

prettynutter-Happy that you liked it! I liked writing it! lol!

xxxxxxxxxx-Well, Kikyo might be a little over obsessed, but no bashing…at least…I hope not…Not a lot anyway, and Kagome will start to like Inuyasha in next chapter.

kagomehigurashi12-You just gotta love it when the cows start roaring!


	11. Lilly Maiden vs Miroku

AN: Yes, it is here, to celebrate getting 300 reviews, at last, for all of you out there, waiting excitedly for this moment, It is another episode of…

BTW: MY BIRTHDAY IS ON JULY 21ST!!!!!! HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY!!!!!! SEND IN ALL PRESENTS TO ME!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!! AND WATCH AS I EAT YOUR CAKE!!!!!!!

---------

Lilly's World of Cows!!!!

And today, in the studio, we have….Miroku!!!! Everyone, lets give him a round of applause!!!

Audience: (claps weakly)

LM: Alrighty Miroku, let's get down to business.

Miroku: (sly look as hand begins to twitch) Yes?

LM: (pulls out rubber mallet) Now, first of all, we need to lay down some ground rules.

Miroku: (blinks) Ground rules?

LM: Yes, like number 1, you are not allowed to grope any behinds and number 2 you can't ask anyone to bear your child, that includes females, AND MALES.

Miroku: (sheepish look) Why do I have to follow them?

LM: Because if you don't, I'll be sure to let Sango know, and I don't think she'll be too happy with you, will she?

Miroku: (grumbles about evil interviewers and evil purple teddy bears.) FINE!! BUT WAIT TILL MY MOMMY HEARS!!!

LM: (sweatdrop) Okay, first of all, I think all of our viewers out there would like to know—

Miroku: I know, I know!

LM: …You do?

Miroku: Yup! They would like to know ….If they can have the honor of bearing my child! And the answer is, of course, yes! (smiles proudly)

LM: … … … … …

Audience: … … … … …

LM: (bangs mallet into palm threateningly) Could I have that again?

Miroku: (looks very nervous) Uh…Um…I said…I have…absolutely…no clue…Please…be my guest…go right on ahead?

LM: That's better. Now, as I was saying, Inuchick06, InuyashaShowFanatic, InuAngel, and myself would like to know, WHY MUST YOU GRAB WOMEN'S BUTTS???????????

Miroku: … … … Do I really have to answer that?

LM: (bangs mallet again) Do you really have to ask?

Miroku: (sweats) No… I grab females behinds, because…its…a habit?

LM: Uh-huh… How did this peverted habit get started?

Miroku: Well, it started in Preschool. We were learning to square dance, and my hand 'accidentally' brushed against my partner's behind. It was soft, and really warm, like a marshmallow, and since then, I've been 'accidentally' grabbing female behinds. (smiles in dream land)

LM: … … … Okay! (claps over enthusiastically) Now! Time for, THE WARDROBE!!!

Miroku: What's the wardrobe?

Producer people: (whispering) Hey, that's not in the program!

LM: Now, let's take a closer look at your outrageous outfit in the previous chapter!

Miroku: (confused) My outfit?

LM: Yes, your stylish, yet unfashionable outfit from the previous chapter.

Miroku: (blinks) OHH….THAT outfit!

LM: (flips through the book) Ah-ha! Here we go! Let's start with the bell bottoms. Where did you get them, and what made you feel like wearing them?

Miroku: JC Penny, and I like bell bottoms, they make me look for feminine.

LM: O.o Platform shoes?

Miroku: Shoes R Us, and I trip easier in platforms.

LM: (Is there such a thing as shoes are us?) Both socks?

Miroku: I learned to knit them! Aren't they beautiful? (looks proudly at his mismatched socks)

LM: … … … Hawaiian shirt?

Miroku: Oh, got that when Inuyasha and I took a vacation at the farm. Found it in a stack of hay a cow was eating.

LM: O.o…. …. o.O … …And the…chain?

Miroku: (smiles) Ebay.

LM: Ebay? And the nose ring?

Miroku: Oh, that old thing? I got that off the blackmarket. It was a birthday present from some of my… crew…

LM: Hot pink lipstick?

Miroku: Stole from Inuyasha.

LM: Fake ear ring stud? Headless teddy bear nose ring?

Miroku: Hijacked it off an old lady, when I 'helped' her across the street.

LM: Hijacked it off an old lady? How sick and low are you?

Miroku: Hey! She was asking for it! I mean, come on now! How many grandmas do you see walking around with ear ring studs as big as a hubcap?

LM: (suspicious glare) Is she in anyway related to you?

Miroku: Well, now that you mention it, she is my mother's mother's cousin's, uncles's, sister's, daughter's, father's, brother's, father's, sister, three times removed and to the power of 5.

Audience: (grabs notepads as they try to figure out what he just said)

LM: (Just ignores his last comment) Now, before you leave, some of our viewers would like to ask you a few questions.

Miroku: (laid back look) Ask away.

LM: Alrighty, first, from RavensFollower, if you could do any one thing for Sango, what would it be?

Miroku: Hmm…Sango, I would probably take her out to a … spa…yeah… (THE look appears in his eyes)

LM: InuyashaShowFanatic, will you marry any other girl besides Sango?

Miroku: I hope not! Sango's butt is the warmest and softest ever! I could live with that forever!

LM: (making mental note to tell Sango) InuAngel wants to know why do you destroy innocent TB?

Miroku: (glares around the studio) They're everywhere!!! HEAR MY CRY AND FEEL MY WRATH!!!!!! THEY ONCE ATTACKED ME IN MY SLEEP!!! SINCE THEN, I HAVE MADE A SOLEMN VOW TO DESTROY THEM ALL!!!

LM: NMareB4Xmas1223, how come you have a teddy bear collection?

Miroku: (calms down) Why, to destroy of course!

LM: Loverofangelus73069 would like to know how did you get purple eyes?

Miroku: You see, they're actually contacts that glow in the dark! Cool huh? Another great item from Ebay!

LM: Please tell Fanius when was the first time (age) you got slapped by a girl for being…well yourself?

Miroku: I was first slapped by a female at the age of 0. As soon as I was born, I pinched my mum's butt and she slapped me. From then on, she's been saying I've got mental problems, but I don't think so, do you?

LM: I'm going to choose not to answer that one. Last but least, Demonchik39 would like to know that if you could have one wish, what would it be?

Miroku: (suddenly thoughtful) One wish huh? Hmmm…Well, I would wish for something from Victoria Secrets.

LM & Audience: Facevaults

Miroku: Can I go now? Sango's waiting for me. She says she doesn't trust me in a crowd of people, but I think I'm very trust worthy don't you? (begins walking out)

LM: (lifts head up and in a scary voice) Miroku…DraGonMistress704 says the teddy bear mafia are after you…and they're not pleased with all the teddy bears you've destroyed.

Miroku: NOOOOO!!!!!!!! NOO!!!! I TELL YOU THEY STALK ME!!!! OH THE FEAR AND TERROR!!!! (high tails out of the studio)

LM: (giggles insanely to self as she pulls out her teddy bear mafia badge)

Audience: (once again, claps weakly)

Producers: Well folks! You've just read another edition of, Lilly's World of Cows! When the review counter hits 400, you get, Lilly vs. Inuyasha!

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AN: How did you like it? I know its not that great, but like I said, Idea Muse is still hating me. I really need to get a hold of some happy pills. Anyway, go ahead and start asking your questions for Inuyasha. Did I mention my B-day is on July 21st?


	12. NOTICE

Sorry to disappoint everyone who hoped for a new chap. This is a notice that this story will continue, only updates will be postponed for 2 weeks because I'm going to Yellow Mountain. Unfortunately, there is no internet access to use while climbing… so, please be patient and bear with me. I love all me reviews! They light up me story life! And as soon as I get back, I'll take this notice down, so you'll know that updates are about to begin. Once again thanx, and don't get mad, get glad! (snickers to self)

Also, thanks and buncha love to all who gave me birthday shout outs and spent an extra few seconds, burning calories as they typed Happy B-Day Lilly! I love them! Read them as soon as I logged in!

InuyashaShowFanatic

demonchik39

TheBlueMoon

Strawberii Bunny

KOGA'sgurl

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO to the power of INFINITY!!!!!

As a compensation, I found an extra funny poem/list thingy you can read while waiting for me to come back!!!!It kept entertained...for who knows how long...I was rolling on the COUCH (lol Nekoyuff16!) laughing my cows off!

_**The Poopie List**_

**GHOST POOPIE: **The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet.

**CLEAN POOPIE: **The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.

**WET POOPIE: **The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won't ruin them with stains.

**SECOND WAVE POOPIE: **This happens when you're done poopie-ing and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize that you have to poopie some more.

**POP-A VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD POOPIE: **The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.

**LINCOLN LOG POOPIE: **The kind of poopie that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.

**GASSY POOPIE: **It's so noisy, that everyone within earshot is giggling.

**DRINKER'S POOPIE: **The kind of poopie you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.

**CORN POOPIE: **Self explanatory.

**GEE-I-WISH-I-COULD-POOPIE POOPIE: **The kind where you want to poopie but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.

**SPINAL TAP POOPIE: **That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you'd swear it was leaving you sideways.

**WET CHEEKS POOPIE (The Power Dump): **The kind that comes out so fast, your butt cheeks get splashed with water.

**THE DANGLING POOPIE: **This poopie refuses to drop in the toilet even though you are done poopie-ing it. You just hope that a shake or two will cut it loose.

**THE SURPRISE POOPIE: **You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you are about to fart, but oops --- a poopie!


	13. Pie

AN: Here is Chapter 10! I apologize for the long pause, though I did enjoy making my readers suffer!!! Bwahahahaha!!!!! No actually, what really happened was that after I got back (legs hurted like a rampage of cows went over them) I got a fever. 104 degrees Faerineheit, or 39.3 degrees celcius…which ever you use. I was basically chained onto the bed and pumped full of pills that made me sweat like mad. Chinese medicine is …disgusting to say the least, but really really effective…. Yeah, anyway, long story short, I got sick, I'm back, and now, on with the story!

Dedicated to: ME, AND MYSELF, AND MY INSANE SELF!!!!!!! Mwahahahahahha!!!!!

BTW: I'm going to add a little section at the beginning of each chap from now on, comparing China to America. I just find the two places very different. You don't have to read it. Just typed for fun!

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On the Subject of…

Pizza.

Chinese people eat pizza from a frying pan. They have Pizza Hut, but that's about it. And pizza is eating using a fork and a knife. It is considered rude to eat it with you hands. (I learned the hard way) The pizza size is not large, medium, or small, but counted in numbers. Like for example, I would tell the waiter dude I want a pizza that was size 9 (about a medium). In conclusion, I like USA pizza better. More variety, and less formal. Perfect for throwing, and feeding to the dog.

-----------

Pardon the Parody

On the way to the amusement park, the three boys were mainly silent, with the exception of Miroku, who was conversing with the three females quite animatedly. Inuyasha sent an occasional glare at them, and Sesshomaru just ignored them altogether, choosing wisely to instead, look at the road.

Rin, Kagome, and Sango were having an absolutely charming time though, as they chatted away, quite animatedly. By the time the group reached the park entrance, the three females had gotten to know each other pretty well.

Sesshomaru helped Rin out of the car and went to go buy the tickets. The rest of the members waited at the gate.

After a few minutes, Sesshomaru came back with the tickets and everyone went in for what they hoped to be a night full of fun laughter and lots of cows.

Kagome's eyes widened as she took in all the rides. Sango's eyes widened as she saw all the games. Inuyasha's eyes widened as he saw all the food stands, and Miroku… Well, his eyes widened when he saw the female population hanging around.

Rin laughed as she said excitedly,

"Come on! Lets start with some games then go on the rides!"

"But…What about the food?" Inuyasha asked whiningly.

Kagome tugged at his arm, pulling him towards a game stand.

"We'll talk about that later. I want to have fun right now!"

When they reached the game, Kagome's eyes were immediately drawn to a giant stuffed plushie of a cow. Squealing she immediately turned towards the game determined to win, regardless of the money she had to pay.

She groaned as she saw what it was. It was arm wrestling with this muscle man. Kagome couldn't even win an arm wrestle game against her brother, or her grandpa. Now, if she wanted that cow she didn't have much of a choice. Already feeling defeat washing over her, she laid down the money and sat in the seat opposite of her opponent. As soon as the timer went off, Kagome was down. Her opponent looked at his adversary surprised. He had never beaten such an easy opponent before.

Why was she doing this? Kagome asked herself as she put her money down again. She had just lost 5 times in a row. She positioned herself as she prepared to lose again. That's when she noticed that her opponent was yawning. The nerve of him! Just cause she lost every single game, that didn't give him the right to be rude.

Inuyasha looked around. He just saw her a second ago. Where did the ball go? She was headed to a game and he had followed until a crowd of people separated them for a few seconds, and when they were gone…so was she. All of a sudden though, he heard a furious roar nearby.

"YOU DRUNK FISH!!! I'LL SLICE YOUR ARM OFF AND PARBOIL IT IN A POT OF SPOILED MILK!!! AND THEN FEED IT UP YOUR EARS WITH TABASCO SAUCE!!!!! MAY ALL THE COWS WHO SWIM IN THE BOTTOMLESS SEA OF DOOM CURSE YOU AND YOUR EVIL WATERMELON LIKE STRENGTH!!!!"

Inuyasha grinned as he followed her voice. After all, how many people do you hear with such creative threats? A few seconds later he saw her and another strange male arm to arm, the timer about to go off.

Blinking, he asked,

"Ball, what are you doing?"

"I'M TRYING TO WIN THAT COW!!! BUT THIS EVIL HALF PURPLE DUCK KEEPS GETTING THE BETTER OF ME!!!" was the heated answer he got.

The timer went off and Kagome once again… lost… After another 3 turns of miserable losing, Inuyasha couldn't take it anymore. At this rate, she was going to lose all her money and he wasn't going to be able to eat.

Grumbling, he paid the fair and sat down, to the surprise of Kagome. The crowd buzzed excitedly. This was getting interesting. The timer went off and, as usual, a hand went down.

But it wasn't the usual small petite hand of a girl, it was a bulky, meatly hand, and it was being held down by a long, sharp nailed hand, that didn't even twitch.

Inuyasha looked bored as he stared at his opponent, who was sweating considerably. This was too easy. He could barely even feel the man's effort. At last, when the man couldn't take it anymore, he let go and turned to the prize giver.

"Oy! I won fair and square. Now give the ball her stupid cow so I can get myself some grub."

Kagome nearly fainted with joy as the cow grew bigger and bigger until at last, it was in her arms. So soft, and fuzzy. After all her effort, she had finally won. Well…technically, Inuyasha won. And speaking of Inuyasha, where was he? Kagome turned around to see him waiting for her. She ran and caught up with him.

"Thanks, Inuyasha."

Silence

"I really appreciate your help."

Silence

Kagome fumed. Here she was, thanking him and he ignores her.

"Oh, and Inuyasha?"

Silence

"I also take back calling you mutated goat."

Inuyasha bristled.

"When did you ever call me a MUTATED GOAT?!?!?!"

He asked, turning on Kagome, who had a very innocent look on her face.

"Never, but I was thinking it."

He was about to reply when the smell of food stopped him in his tracks. He raced toward the scent with Kagome following close behind.

Soon, the reached the source of the smells. It was coming from a long table heaped full with food. Hotdogs, corn, cotton candy, popcorn, fries, pies of every flavor…just to name a few.

Inuyasha was about start on the food when a hand swiped at him, missing by a few millimeters. He looked up to see an old lady with an eye patch and a name badge that indicated her name was Kaede.

"Theif! No work, no food! This is the prize for the winner of the archery contest!"

Inuyasha blinked. Archery? Prize? Contest? Well, if it came with food… He'd do it. After paying the money to join the contest. He picked up the bow and shot a few practice rounds. After using up 50 arrows without even grazing the edge of the target, he groaned in frustration. This was hopeless.

At that moment, he felt Kagome tap his arm.

"What do you want ball?"

Kagome smiled.

"I talked to Kaede-sama and she agreed to let us switch spots."

"Why would I switch spots with you?"

"Because I used to be on the school archery team, and no matter how bad I am, I can't be worse than you."

And as much as Inuyasha hated to admit it, it ball had a point. He really didn't have much of a choice did he? He could either pathetically lose, or he could switch and hope that the ball knew what she was doing.

Handing her the bow and the last 5 arrows, he growled,

"Please don't lose. I really want that food. My stomach is killing me like mad."

Kagome looked at him. He had never ever said please before. That food must mean a lot to him. Nodding, she followed the other contestants as they all took their places.

With a word from Kaede, all 25 entrants released their arrows. Of those, only 20 of those made the target. On the second round, only 18 made the outer circle. 13 made it into the inner circle on the 3rd round. Finally, on the fourth round, 3 people made it into semi-center circle.

Kagome looked at her opponents. They were both steady and had good pose. They were going to be tough to beat, but she had to win. She couldn't let Inuyasha down…or…he'd… … …starve.

Picking up her last arrow, she notched it and aimed. Then, with the word from Kaede, the last three let loose their arrows. Three thuds of arrows hitting the target were heard, but only one hit the bulls eye. Kaede walked over to the target and examined it. Then, pulling Kagome's arrow out, she proclaimed,

"Kagome is the winner! Please accept your prize!"

Kagome felt like bursting with joy. She still had her skills! Looking for Inuyasha, she found him pigging out on the food she worked so hard to win. He didn't even come to congratulate her! Huffing, she walked away.

After a few moments, she heard Inuyasha following her.

"….um… The food is really good."

Silence

"Wanna hot dog?"

Silence

"Pie?"

Silence

"Cotton candy? Slushie? Popcorn?"

Silence

Inuyasha searched though his mind for something to say. And then he hit on it. The perfect thing to say to a girl who was practically spitting fire.

"I can see your underwear."

Kagome had it. She blew up. That was her last nerve, and it had just snapped. Picking up a chair, she spun onto Inuyasha, ready to smash him into atom sized pieces.

Then, she saw that he was smiling at her. Not his evil smirk or his trademark sneer, but a nice smile. Surprised, she looked at him, waiting for him to say something, anything to explain his mysterious change of mood.

"Thanks, Kagome."

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AN: BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I wrote the longest chapter ever to make up for the longest wait you've guys had. Hoped ya liked it. I just couldn't end on a cliffie after all the reviews and birthday shout outs I got… Maybe next chap… Also added more then the usual amount of fluff because you were all nice to me!!!!!

CHAPTER SPOILER: Next chapter, you learn about Miroku and Sango's time at the park.

Thanks to EVERYONE who reviewed. It was wonderful. I just updated the poopie list and put up an interview and I already received 50 reviews. You guys must really want the next interview bad! (smiles)

XsangoX-Owie! I don't wear braces but my friend does. Looks painful.

InuyashaShowFanatic-I'm not too fond of Kikyo myself. But I'm not sure about bashing yet…

NMareB4Xmas1223-Yeah…You just gotta despise Barney…Evil purple dinosaur…

DraGonMistress704-I'll see if I can get him smacked in the next chapter!

Neko-Yuff16-I think Miroku is just like that. He adds laughter and humor into the story!

Fainus-Hmmm…Ask Miroku…He has strange places to get merchandise…

Koneko8844-Thank you! I'm happy you think I did a good job!

crazy-inu-chick-YES!!! BWAHAHA!! I AM THE BEST!!!! (also does happy dance)

demonchik39-Hehe…Yeah…Its kinda obvious that Kikyo is the ex huh?

saber-kon-Cloning! Now that's a good idea! I'ma go clone me old cow now!

Iiya-yasha-I can't tell you who the guy is or that would be spoiling the story. But the cow obsession is because when I first started writing, I was obsessed with cows. I'm into flying burgers now, but I still luv cows!

KOGA'sgurl-Hehe! I have a corrupted mind! We could kidnap all the children's barbies and boil them up!

Shiriko-Hehehe! I think you were sugar high when you reviewed! That's a cool idea. Make them all go sugarhigh.

Prepare For I Am The Sugar Kitten- It didn't take that long. I mean, this is me we're talking about.

Angel-of-Darkness69-MWAHAHA!!! My story is liked! Thank you!

InuyashaJunky-More updates, more laughter!!!!!! (rolls on the coffee up laughing)

InuAngel-Are you back from your vacation now? I got back from mine!

Who Ah Yooo-Lol! When I first read your review, I thought you wrote a haiku!

Eternalhappiness-I have updated, though it wasn't soon because I was climbing mountains and getting fevers!

prettynutter-No need for originality! As the writer, that is my responsibility. Your job is to get me sugar pills!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! SUGAR!!!!

Safreil-Thanks! Miroku's outfit seems loved by everyone, and Kikyo is now in the story.

Ainasister29-I love to write hilarious things!

RenaeAurora-I just love to hear I'm inspiring a younger generation of headless teddy bear writers!

Kirei Baka Kasumi-Hehe! Everyone love Miroku's outfit!!! I didn't expect it to be that funny!

firequeen-Yup, ex is kikyo and I was definitely salt high when I wrote this!

Jennifer-Yay!!! I will always be writing!! Even if all the cows jump over da moon!!!!

pinkjingling-I love nutter butters!!!!! Yay!!!! Go Cows!!!!! MOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Kagome2691-Wow! That really boosts a person's self esteem, to know that you come on just to read my fic! Thanks buncha!

MikaToy-Of course Kikyo isn't gonna steal Inuyasha! And of course the two are going to fall in love first! Don't worry, I like those fics the best too.

Liz-Oh yeah…More memory pills for you. You have reviewed, but that's okay! Cause I like to see your sunny name! And Barbies should be melted….


	14. Egg

AN: SOOOOOOOOOOO SORRY FOR THE LONG DELAY!!!! YOU ALL MUST HAVE THOUGH I WAS DEAD OR SOMETHING!!!!!! I was getting over jet lag and all that, plus school started as well. I'm soo happy because I got over 40 reviews for one chappie!!!! And to apologize and thank everyone, you will get SUPER LONG CHAPPIE WITH SANGO/MIROKU!!!! Anyway...YIPPIE!!! Here is chappie 11!!! And now...I'ma go visit my cow!!! Enjoy reading!!!

Dedicated to: EVERYONE WHO WAS PATIENT TO WAIT FOR ME TO UPDATE!!! I LUB YOU ALL!!!!!!! PULEAZE FORGIVE ME!!!!!!

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On the Subject of...

Corn.

American corn is better.

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Pardon the Parody

Sango excitedly looked around at all the games that surrounded her. Most were shooting games, or games that required some aiming skills. She grinned, knowing that those would be easy for her. Spotting a Frisbee game, she turned to look for Miroku to call him over...

Only to find him, gazing at a nearby female's butt.

Grimacing, she reached over and dragged a poor complaining Miroku away.

"Awww Sango! What's got you so worked up?"

Sango chose to ignore him.

Miroku grinned as he leaned closer to her.

"Are you jealous?"

WHABAM

"CURSE THE BLEEPITY BLEEP COWS!!!"

He had forgotten about that gigantic boomerang she always carried with her. And now, he was paying for it as he laid on the ground, sporting a nice sized cow egg on his head.

Sango was fuming. The onlookers could have sworn there was smoke coming out her ears and nostrils.

"First of all, it is rude to go around staring at people's butts!!! Second of all, I am not jealous!!! At least not over some stupid overgrown sushi stick like you!!!"

Saying so, she stormed off, leaving him there to his fate, whatever that may be.

Now, you would think by now, Miroku had learned his lesson, but then again, we know how hard headed he can be. He called out after Sango's retreating back,

"I know you're jealous!!! You love me and so does that cute cuddly butt of yours!"

3

2

1

(censored for the innocent minds who are reading this)

Her boomerang flew back into her open hand as Sango strapped it back on, and calmly walked away. After a while, the crowd that had formed over Miroku's body dispersed.

One couple said to each other,

"Do you think we should take him to get medical care?"

They looked at Miroku...

"Nah"

And left him.

When Miroku felt like it would be safe to get up, he slowly inched up off the floor, startling several passerbyers as they watch a bruised and bloody body suddenly get up. He gently prodded his goose egg and winced as it throbbed painfully. Dang, that girl had a hard hit... He needed to speak to the TB Mafia counsel and have them review this matter over.

With that thought in his mind, he began heading to a large and purple tent in the distance. As he walked, he kept on remembering the look on Sango's face as she denied being jealous. He could spot denial an inch away, and she was definitely jealous.

'I wonder why?' He mused.

'Is it my manly looks? My handsome charisma? My buff torso?'

As Miroku was doing all his...stuff, Sango had long since gone off on her own.

'I know Rin warned us not to wander off by ourselves, but with so many people around, what can happen?'

She spotted a large balloon shaped purple tent nearby. Having nothing better to do, she went inside to investigate.

Inside, it was dark and the air was heavily scented with the smell of ginger bread. Suddenly, from out of the gloom, a dark and boding voice called out,

"Who's dares to enter the lair of the HPTB?"

Sango blinked. What kind of fair was this?

"...Uh...my name is Sango......"

There was hushed whispering among the shadows, until the voice spoke out again.

"And what do you seek here, Sir Sango?"

"SIR?!?!?!?!?" Sango fumed.

"I'M A BLOODY GIRL!!!! DON'T YOU HAVE ANY EYES????"

There were sudden hisses throughout the tent.

"It's a girl!"

"Throw her out!"

"Cook her!"

"Roast her alive!"

"Then we eat her!"

"Hurrah to that!"

Sango was sweating now. She didn't like the way this conversation was going. She turned to exit the tent, but found the entrance blocked by the largest, headless purple teddy bear she had ever seen. Panicking, she ran blindly into the shadows and was grabbed by several pairs of cottony feeling hands. She reached for her boomerang, but it had disappeared in her struggle. She was roughly pushed into a corner of the tent and tied down. Next to her, she could just barely make out the shapes of people filling a pot with water and throwing bundle of sticks underneath it. What had she gotten herself into?

Miroku spotted the purple tent, which was the home base for the HPTB corporation. Walking in, he noticed the smell of burning wood, as the voice of his leader called out,

"Who dares to enter the lair of the HPTB?"

"It is I! Miroku the Prophesizer!"

There was a mummer of approval going through the crowd.

"You are welcome here! Would you like to join us for dinner? We just caught a nice human girl, who calls herself Sango."

Miroku blinked once, then again, and then finally a third time as a thought entered his head.

'Don't I know someone named Sango?'

Then, the truth hit him like a roaring cow. The HPTB had caught Sango and were going to eat her! Beautiful Sango with her cute derriere and her quick to flare temper. No! He couldn't let them do this to her! In fact, he was going to save her! And in return, she'll love him so much that...

Well... maybe he was thinking to far ahead. First things first, he had to get her out of here or she'd be sushi, or humanshie.

"I'm going to go wash up for..uh..supper." He told the socializing crowd. A few nodded, but most ignored him and continued their conversations among each other. Miroku edged toward a flap, that separated the tent into halves and when no one was looking, he slipped through. Or at least, he thought no one was looking.

Finding himself in the dark, he called out softly, "Sango!!! Are you in here? I know you can't resist my manly charms and sex appeal!"

He was answered with a relieved sounding gasp and a, "Miroku! I'll kill you when we get out!"

He grinned. Yup, it was dear, sweet Sango alright. Hearing one of her threats was like coming home to a warm dinner after a hard day at work.

He walked in the direction of where her voice had been coming from.

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THIS IS NOT AN AUTHOR'S NOTE!!! THE CHAPTER IS NOT OVER!!! KEEP READING!!!

Okay, like I stated, the chapter still has a little way to go, but this was the only way I could think of to get my reader's attention. I am looking for someone who knows how to CG to do cover art and someone to do illustrations. If you would like to help me out and support the story, please e-mail me, or post it in a review. Thank you!

ON WITH THE STORY!!!

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Sango's eyes nearly teared as she saw the dim outline of Miroku heading toward her. She had started to doubt if he would ever come. But they didn't have time for sappy reunions.

Miroku hurriedly untied her and together, they slipped out an open flap and into the busy carnival street, causing many surprised looks from the passer byers. Walking as fast as they could without running, they didn't stop until they reached an open space, where it was too loud to be overheard by others.

"I think we should be safe here for now," Miroku stated, looking around.

"Um...Miroku?" Sango asked timidly, not making eye contact. "I think you can let go of my hand now."

Miroku looked down, and turned to the shade of a radish. He was holding Sango's hand tightly, and he hadn't even noticed it. Quickly, he dropped it, but for some odd reason, he didn't really want to let go of it.

"So..." He said, just cause his mind wouldn't work at the moment and give him some witty phrase.

"Thanks" Sango said it so softly, she wasn't sure if Miroku could actually hear her, but, she felt something warm touch her cheek, and she looked up to stare into Miroku's dark blue orbs.

Miroku gently touched Sango's cheek. She was really very beautiful. He didn't know why he never noticed until now. Or maybe he had noticed, but she just seemed golden right now. He knew right away in his mind that he wanted to stay with her forever, to protect her, and to watch her throw her temper tantrums.

Making a daring move, he quickly leaned down and caught her lips with his own. They tasted sweet, like pineapples.

Sango's eyes widened as her mind tried to comprehend what had just happened, but in truth, it didn't have to do anything, the mind could leave this job to the heart. Slowly, she relaxed. She had never ever kissed another soul before, much less a male, but, it felt so right, like it was destined to be.

When she finally broke away for air, Miroku just looked at her, a cocky grin on his face. No words were needed to express how the two felt, it was obvious from looking at their faces that they were in love.

"I knew you loved me, you and all that wonderful behind of yours! Didn't I tell you, that you were jealous?"

Yup, Miroku never would learn his lesson. Sango's hand came flying at his cheek, only to hit air.

Ducking Miroku laughed.

"You'll have to move faster! I'm starting guess what your next move will-"

He was cut off as Sango's foot went whamming into his stomach. Grinning, Sango leaned down, over that hunched Miroku.

"You'll never be able to learn all my moves."

Miroku simply groaned, but Sango could tell it was fake.

"I have a question Miroku, what is the HPTB?"

Miroku opened on eyelid sleepily.

"Give me a kiss and I'll tell you."

"MIROKU!!!"

Closing his eye, he replied in a noncaring manner,

"Alright, no kiss, no answer."

Sango groaned. There really must be something wrong with her. Leaning down, she gave a quick peck to Miroku.

"Will you tell me now?"

With his eyes still closed, he answered,

"Headless Purple Teddy Bear."

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AN: How'd you like it? There were a few complaints that the Inu/Kag chappie didn't have enough fluff, so I added more in this one. See how much I lub you! A few announcements now:

1. School has started, and I am officially loaded down, so expect updates to take a while.

2. I will get the Inu interview as soon as I have time to type it all up.

3. As I mentioned earlier, I need CG artists who sill do cover art and illustrations. If you can do this, or know of anyone that would be willing to do this, contact me by e-mail of leave a review.

4. I am on the watch list of over 50 people (Yay!!! You all rock!). Which means, I will expect at least fifty reviews before I continue with the story.

Thanx to reviewers:

demonchik39-I got the poopie thingy from an e-mail sent by a friend. Lol! Hope this chap was closer to bringing a tear to your eye!

Kagome2691-I will definitely check out your fic! Because I love yu-gi0oh! Especially Bakura!!!!! And yes, I know that the two demon brothers are hot...BUT SESSHOMARU IS MINE!!!!!! Lol!

Liz-Hmm...cutting of their heads...I should try that every now and then. May be practice on my brother! (and yup, you reviewed twice again! Lol!)

Fainus-I just love to put a smile on people's faces, and I know what you mean. Everyone has got their bad days, but a good story'll cheer you right up!!!!!!! Happy Happy Happy!!!!

azn.viet-Thank you! Sorry about the long update though...DON'T KILL ME!!!!!

Demonchild93-Woah, your name is really similar to another reviewer of mine! Her name is demonchik39!!! And thanks for the compliment! I love to bring a bit of laughter to this world! Lol! And cows are just cool like that!

Strawberrie Bunny-Hehe! I love pie!!!! Pie rocks! My fav is pecan pie!!!

azn-xoxo-Hehehe...You have no idea how many times a day I hear that...But weirdness and funniness is what makes that world go round! Next to gravy of course!

Kirei Baka Kasumi-Well, Miroku has a lot of interesting things, and as for Inuyasha, well, I guess you'll just hafta wait for his interview won't you? Hehehe!!!! I'm so evil!!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Electric Venom-Yay!!! I am brilliant!!! Feel the brilliance!!!! Taste the brilliance!!! Be the brilliance!!!! (now you know why my friends don't compliment me too often!)

Kawaiidustbunny-I lub you name! Dust bunnies are cool! There's like a million of the under my bed! Lol!

Divine Wolf-Yup! Every author has her own groove! I am unique unto myself!

KgR-R1/2IC-IyR-Hmm...MirokuhyperknifeTOTAL HYPER DESTRUCTION!!!!!!

Blueice anime gurl-Hehehe! That's my plan. Make everyone laugh so hard, they'll die laughing!!!! Feel my insanity!!!! BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!

pinkjingling-Yeah! Microwave a watermelon!!!! And commit world destruction! That's a great way to spend your afternoon!

saber-kon-Sesshomaru is mine!!!!!! And he won't have doggy ears, he'lll have cat ears!!!!! Cause he's shexshy like that!!!!!

loverofangelus73069-Yup! I love my creativity too! And cows are actually my thing, cause I love cows!!!!!!

Neko-Yuff16-Oh yeah!!! We can't have Inuyasha being mean to his special girl now, can we? :)

kagomehigurashi12-Inuyasha was calmly walking down the hallway in school one day, when he gets glomped by Miroku. That was the start of a beautiful friendship!!!

InuyashaShowFanatic-Woah! You sound really hyper!!!! I'll join you!!!! LALALALALA!!!!! HYPER HYPER BUNNIES LIKE TO CHACHA!!!

Kage Taijiya-Hehehe!!! I'm BA-CK too!!!!lol!

I OWN ALL-Da bomb! I haven't heard that compliment yet! You get a snack for being so creative!!!

Reallyconfused-(suspicious look) What have you got against the cows huh? Cows are cool!!! They rock my world!!!!!

Prepare For I Am The Sugar Kitten-Okay, first things first, I LOVE YOUR TOES!!!!!!! (coughs) Sorry, just had to get that out, and you were the lucky reviewer! Hehehe!

Crystalz Tearz-Thank you! I'm glad you like it! I have fun writing it too!

InuyashaJunky-Oh yes!!! Can you feel the fluff tonight????

Angel-of-Darkness69-Yeah!!! I love encouragement!!! It inspires me!!! Thank you for your encouragement!!!!

Sakome-I will try to remember your question...I got sooooo many, I'm starting to lose some of them to the question monster, my amnesia...Lol!

crazy-inu-chick-Hahaha!!! What can you say now???? I have given you fluff!!!! Lotsa fluff!!!! You will be buried in fluff!!!!! Mwahahahahaha!!!!

KOGA'sgurl-That's right, I'm a corrupted genius!!! And by barbies, I mean both!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!! Feel the joy of Barbies!!!!!

BlueMiko-Two words: I UPDATED !!! lol! I love your review!!!

inulova4lyfe-I will put that in the interview! Count on it!!! Only 25 people have asked me that same question! Lol!

InuYashaLover-08-Oh yes, Kikyo will be rejected!!! There can only be one cow for Inuyasha, and its Bessie!!!

Pinkpig309-I'm glad the story was funny! I love to write funny things!!!!

Mahanino-Hehehe! I have heard your plead and updated!!!! And cows rock to the end of the earth!!!!

NMareB4xmas1223-Hehehe! That happens to me too! I'll be at a sleepover calmly sleeping, and suddenly jump up and start laughing like mad, then fall start to sleep again! Lol! Scared the heck outa my friends the first time it happened!!!

prettynutter-Hehehe!!! Have some more sugar!!!! (sprinkles saltonto prettynutter)

Bent-not-Broken-At least your hamster peed in her cage, my dog peed on my carpet...-- And many many people tell me they have severe attacks from reading my fic!

TohruHonda1D-Yeah! My sotry rocks!!! That just raises my self esteem like, a hundred percent!


	15. Moon

AN: I AM SOOOOO SOOOOORRRRRYYYYYY! PLEASE FORGIVE ME FELLOW READERS WHO ARE STILL WILLING TO READ MY COW POOP!

sniff I was caught up with school work…. High school is a tough little critter… I am very sorry…

I will do my best to keep up with the story now that its summer, though I may get caught up again (PSAT/SAT/AP testing). Thank you to all the readers who still this!

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Pardon the Parody

Rin grinned up at Sesshomaru.

"Snowball, how do you think those two awkward couples are doing?"

'Snowball' raised his eyebrow.

"Are you playing matchmaker again, Rin?"

Rin looked down, pink on her face. He had guessed her thoughts again.

"No, I was just... yes…"

Sesshomaru sighed. Oh Rin, you'll never learn to leave people alone. But then again, he didn't really have a problem with that. It was, after all, how they met. Sesshomaru was walking in the park to relieve his stress, when Rin had suddenly popped up, and dragged him out to the local cow farm for a cup of milk.

After that, it was only a matter of time before the two got together.

He was interrupted out of his thoughts by a roaring, screaming, creaking sound. Looking up, he noticed a roller coaster filled with silly, high pitched squealing people. Groaning mentally, he turned toward Rin, only to find her staring pityingly at him. Hugging his arm, she said,

"Poor Snowball. All this noise is getting to you, isn't it?"

Sesshomaru smiled at Rin. She knew him better than he knew himself.

"Come on, Snowball. Lets go over to that tent over their! It looks fun." And with that, he was dragged off toward a pink, heart shaped tent. When they got closer, the noticed a sign that said,

"Official Carnival Costume Contest"

"Oh no… Rin!" Sesshomaru nearly bellowed out.

"There is no way in the 7 kingdoms of cowdom that am I going in there!"

"Oh Snowball! Please!" Rin begged, lip quivering.

Sesshomaru groaned. Why did she have to look so CUTE? Why was he still WALKING? AND WHY WAS HE ABOUT TO GIVE IN?

"Snowball! I will be forever indebted to you! Please?"

That was the last straw. Sesshomaru bowed his head in defeat.

"Fine." He replied, reluctantly. What had he gotten himself into? The two entered the tent, led by a happy Rin.

Inside was a cloud of darkness. Sesshomaru strained his eyes, but it was useless, he couldn't see a single thing. He didn't like this… You never know what kind of weirdos could pop out of the dark.

"Rin Darhlin'! I haven't seen you in AGES! How are you Darhlin'?"

Sesshomaru spun around in circles, trying to find the owner of the voice, but it was impossible. He calmed as he felt Rin's hand tighten around his. Well, if Rin said it was okay…

"And who is this wonderful manly hunk you have brought to me today Darhlin'?"

Sesshomaru bristled as the speaker came into view. Him! A manly hunk! He was far more than that! He was the epoch of manliness!

"It's nice to see you again Kagura! Last time I saw you, you were on your way to Peru with a sack of bootlegged feathers," said Rin cheerfully to the horror of Sesshomaru.

Good lord! His dear sweet Rin was in cahoots with an illegal smuggler! And what's worse, this Kagura person was in the feather trade! Everyone knew that feathers were illegal in Peru because the government feared people would tickle each other to death and no one would get any work done.

What if the Peruvian officials got a hold of Rin and forced her to spend the rest of her days milking the dreaded creatures called LLAMAS?

He couldn't let that happen, but before he could say something, Kagura beat him to the punch…literally.

"Nah, those crazy hermits livin' down the street from the local Starbucks saw a downy feather sneak out of my sack and called the local pigeons to attack meh," said Kagura handing Rin a cup of punch.

As Rin raised the glass of raspberry punch to her lips, something floating on the surface of the liquid caught Sesshomaru's attention.

"RIN! STOP!"

But it was too late. His precious Rin, famous for her unique ability to down an entire gallon of liquid, had already chugged the entire cup. Before all of the juice was fully settled in her belly, she wavered in a stupor. All at once, her eyes fell shut and her legs gave out beneath her.

Sesshomaru grabbed her before she could hit the floor. Easing Rin into sitting position, he quickly felt for her pulse. Thankfully it was still beating strong. Assured that Rin wasn't dying he faced the evil feather smuggler angrily.

"WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER?" he yelled furiously.

"Stop shouting Dahlin', you'll get me in trouble with the authorities." Kagura hushed him nervously.

They had already caught her once, and she wasn't going to get caught again. This time, she could end up doing something worse than cleaning port-a-potties… like eating her veggies…

Sesshomaru couldn't care less whether this insane psycho-deranged got in trouble with the government. In fact, people like her should be locked up for the good of the entire world.

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO RIN?" he shouted again.

Kagura winced. But heck, could Rin's buddy's voice carry! If she didn't move quickly, the Peruvians would be upon her! And if the Peruvians got her… well… she didn't want to think about that.

"Rin is just sleeping Dahlin'! Now do calm down and let me explain."

Sesshomaru glared at Kagura and waited. What Kagura didn't see was one of his hands sneak into his pocket and press a button on his cell phone.

Why he had the Peruvian government officials on speed dial was something even Rin wouldn't be able to answer, but it sure came in handy every now and then. Like NOW.

"Ah, now that's a good Dahlin'. Now just follow me, and… I guess you'd better bring Rin Dahlin' with you. I would so just hate for her to miss all the fun."

Kagura grinned wickedly to herself as she held a curtain that was separating the tent open, like a tiger inviting a rabbit to enter its belly.

Sesshomaru frowned. He didn't like where this was going. Who knew was beyond the curtain? It looked innocent enough but with his superior eyesight, he could see faint patches of dark red on the fire red cloth. It looked suspiciously like dried blood.

Rin shifted in his arms, blew a few spit bubbles, and slept on, oblivious to what was going on. For Rin's sake, he'd better do what he was told, or she'd end up spending the rest of her life as an unconscious, saliva-bubble-blowing girl.

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"Inuyasha?"

"What Ball?"

Kagome's face flashed red. He was doing it again… the little, insignificant CHIPMUNK was insulting her again! She reached into her bag for her ultimate weapon, but before she could thoroughly threaten the white haired dog before her, he said again,

"What do you want?"

"I want to go to that tent over there."

Inuyasha looked up from his empty plate at the tent where the ball was pointing.

"Carnival Costume Contest? Even you can't be that deluded Ball. There is no way we're going to waste out time there!"

A dark shadow came over Kagome's face, but Inuyasha wasn't paying attention. He was looking at his hands, or rather…what wasn't in his hands.

The food…

The wonderful, precious food that the Ball had won for him… it was… GONE!

Inuyasha could feel great, fat, cow sized drops form in his eyes. How could the food be gone! It was his precious…. His lovely yummy precious… and it lived no more. WHERE DID IT DISAPPEAR TO?

His stomach chose that moment to give a very satisfied rolling gurgle.

Ah, that's right. He had eaten all of it in the first five minutes.

"Inuyasha…" said Kagome sweetly.

The white haired male sniffed mournfully.

"I have something for you."

Inuyasha opened his mouth to reply that whatever the Ball had, he didn't want it, but before he could speak, his jumpy nostrils twitched. A beautiful scent came his way and gave his whole body lovely little tingles…the tingles that only food could bring.

Closing his eyes, he inhaled deeply, like a druggie with an addicting drug. His canine sense grabbed hold of his body and he began to track the source of the smell.

Crouching down, nose to the ground, he followed it with great stubbornness. Rain, hail, and Miroku's butcher knife couldn't keep him from… DA SOURCE!

Luckily, DA SOURCE wasn't that far away. Actually, it was right next to him.

His nose bumped into a shoe that looked oddly familiar, but Inuyasha was too busy sniffing to care. He moved up, following a path made by a pair of long, slim legs. Legs? They smelled good, clean and… sorta Ball-ishy.

But he had no time to spare on idle thoughts. Inuyasha determinedly continued up until suddenly…

WHAM

WHACK

WHABOOM

"BLEEEEEEEEP BLEEEEEEEP!"

Groaning slightly, the white haired demon dog lay on the filthy ground and stared upwards. When the pretty, sparkly stars faded from his vision, the first thing he saw was the Ball's furious face. It looked like a really large pimple, fit to burst. In fact, if he wasn't thoroughly beaten all over, Inuyasha would've yanked out the needle he had stolen from his friend and poked at the Ball.

The second thing he noticed was that he had a very decent shot of the Ball's underpants. It was a pretty white color with… black spots on it. A small wildfire started in his gut, but he squashed it down with a large hammer, because his eyes finally saw the third thing.

In one hand, was an extremely large frying pan Inuyasha recognized from the tree house, but his mind had no time to wonder how she had managed to fit it in her small, hot dog sized purse, because in the other hand, the Ball was holding…a HOT DOG!

Jumping to his feet as if he hadn't just been beaten down with an inch of heavy steel, Inuyasha leapt towards his beacon of fluffy bread with a long, protein filled, slightly unhealthy tube shaped meat clamped in between.

Grinning wickedly, Kagome waved the enticing food item over Inuyasha's head.

"Now listen closely to me, my poor dear, starved puppy dog. I'm going to give you two choices. (1) You can either come with me to the Costume tent and I reward you with this delicious, HOT, JUICEY HOT DOG. Or… (2) You can stay here while I go to the Costume tent and leave you to die of lack of food."

Even though she had him tied to a stake as tightly as a pig led to the butcher, Inuyasha couldn't help but waste a few seconds staring in blatant admiration of the Ball. What a woman! What fierce rage and cunning deviousness!

"Well? Which will it be albino fruitcake?"

When Inuyasha looked at the hotdog again, Kagome had her answer. Cackling with pure evilness, she turned on her heels and began heading for the tent, knowing a certain white haired, gluttonous person would be following close behind.

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"Miroku!"

The dark, blue eyed man paused, one foot raised in mid air, like a wise stork.

"Yes Sango, my most beloved derriere?"

When the long haired girl standing a few paces behind him did not inflict any serious, painful, loving punishment, Miroku knew something… something BIG…was up.

Spinning around with what he hoped was a winning, charming, heart throbbing smile, he grabbed Sango's shoulders.

"Sango, Hello Kitty of my heart! You don't have to say it! I understand!"

Sango's eyebrow twitched. This was unusual. Miroku…understanding her for once. Normally, she had to forcefully stuff her words down his ears, then reinforce the message with several… rather painful techniques.

"You do?"

"Yes! I know what you want! I know what you want to say!"

"You do?"

"My lovely beefy cow, we are connected by fate! I can understand you better than any hobo on the street could! And the answer to your question is YES! YES WITH ALL MY HEART!"

Blinking, Sango awkwardly patted Miroku on the head like he was Kilala, her pet kitty with three tails. Sure he was a bite…large, but he was still kinda cuddly. She was really touched by how quick he had agreed to accompany her to the interesting looking tent labeled Carnival Costume Contest, and she didn't even have to ask. Sango hoped that things were going just as well with her friend Kagome and that oddball of a person named Inuyasha.

It looked like their relationship was really budding and blooming.

"Nothing would please me more to bestow upon you the honor of bearing my child!"

Or not.

5 minutes later, Sango headed for the tent with a rather bashed up Miroku following her wearing a new ostrich egg sized bump on his head with several bruises dotting random patches of skin.

-----

"Now, are we clear?"

The corners of Kagura's lips twitched upwards as she stared at Sesshomaru, knowing what the beefy hunk would reply.

Sesshomaru gritted his teeth. Why was he doing this? This was absolutely unlike him and way out of his character. So how had he let himself get talked into this mess?

The answer laid him his arms, now building spit bubble castles with great vigor, for a sleeping person.

"Yes."

-----

"Inuyasha! Stop munching so loudly! The show's about to start."

Kagome hissed at Inuyasha.

"KAGOME!"

Kagome looked at where the call had come from. Sango was waving across the rows of seats at her. A very beaten up Miroku was standing behind her, looking at Sango's bottom.

"Having fun?"

Kagome asked Sango as the friends sat down together in the front center with a perfect view of the stage.

Sango shook her head. Beating up Miroku was rather entertaining, but not eggactly fun. And if getting threatened by an insane cult eager to eat her was fun, then she was a llama.

But Miroku had kissed her…

"It was… different. What about you and demon dog boy?"

Kagome paused to reflect on her evening. She had gotten to know Inuyasha better, mainly that he was a glutton for food.

"We had fun."

Yanking out her giant stuffed cow plushie, she put it on top of her head to protect herself from assassinators. The lights dimmed and a speaker strode onto the stage and welcomed everyone to enjoy the show.

And then the fun began.

People of all ages, from infants carried in by their mothers to wizened grannies and grandpa's each took a turn on the stage, wearing a costume.

The costumes themselves varied in themes and styles. Some were made after animals and some after foods. There were slinky dresses, and outfits from different periods of history, all with a unique twist.

Kagome "ooo-ed" and "ahh-ed" at all the outfits, Inuyasha "ooo-ed" and "ahh-ed" at his hard claimed prize, the hot dog, and Miroku, he "ooo-ed" and "ahh-ed" at the females on the stage.

Finally, the show reached a climax. The speaker returned to the podium.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, Thank you for your enthusiasm tonight. For our final costume entry, I would like the present the designer, world renown, KAGURA-SAMA!"

An elegant woman dressed in a simple kimono walked onto the stage and bowed to the audience. Pulling out a fan, she fluttered it, sending the curtains flapping.

"Thank you for the honor. I am the great, the power, the most awesome KAGURA-SAMA! While I have designed several outfits of beauty, what I will present to you tonight will be my masterpiece, the cream of my creative genius!"

"This sounds interesting," Kagome whispered to Sango.

"I can't wait to see what it is," Sango agreed.

"Thank you for your inspiring words, KAGURA-SAMA!" The speaker said.

"And now… PRESENTING…THE BEAUTIFUL… THE HUNKY…THE MANLY… THE POWERFUL…THE AWE INSPIRING…THE GLORIOUS WHIPPED CREAM ON AN ICE CREAM… LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, LET'S GIVE IT UP FOR OUR MODEL…"

"Must be a gorgeous person," Kagome said excitedly while Sango nodded eagerly.

"MR. SESSHOMARU-SAMA!"

Sesshomaru walked onto the stage amid several clicking and flashing from cameras. As he stepped onto the stage, silence descended on the crowd. He could see Rin sleeping in the front row, right where that she witch Kagura said she would put Rin.

The silence was deafening. Sesshomaru wondered if the outfit made him really look that good. Kagura had assured him it was in the latest style, and illegal smuggler that she was… she did have some credit as a designer.

The motionless quiet of the audience was suddenly broken by a loud PAAAAAAPHOOOOOOOOOOO-yish sound of Inuyasha spitting out his hotdog.

"SESSHOMARU!"

Inuyasha had finally taken his eyes off his food and looked up at the stage, only to see his older brother, who was such a cold, heartless, mean fruitcake, dressed up…in a … … Long, calf length white boots, short short navy blue skirt, sailor uniform with a large red bow and a fat pink broach in the center, long elbow length gloves, and a ribbon around his neck.

His silvery mane of pearlescent white hair was tied into two tails, each streaming out of a round ball of hair at the top of his head. In fact…Sesshomaru looked a lot like that one super hero on one of Miroku's favorite shows… What was the hero's name again?

"SAILOR MOON! MY HERO!"

Miroku's loud scream of adoration broke the spell over the audience and they began to scream, whistle and cheer with absolute undying adoration.

Sesshomaru was a bit taken back by the power of the audience. Did he look that good? He had thought the costume looked odd, almost eggactly like one of the super hero's on that show that Rin loved to watch so much.

The loud noise and rambuncous cheering woke up his sleeping angel. Rin sat up groggily, rubbing the sleep away from her eyes. The first things her soft brown orbs landed on was her lover dressed up as…

The DEFENDER OF LOVE AND JUSTICE…

HER FAVORITE SUPERHERO!

Rin couldn't help it, she burst into happy laughter.

"Sailor Sesshomaru!" she squealed, running on stage and enveloping him in a hug.

"Thank you Snowball! You know just what to do to make me happy!"

Snowball's face flushed red. Rin was the only one who could do that to him. Well… if Rin liked it, then he liked it.

"And now, a word from the designer! What inspired you to design such a beautiful outfit?"

The speaker yelled into the mic, over the roars of approval from the crowd.

Kagura stood up from where she was sitting and patted her kimono. But before her feet could bring her close to the podium, loud sirens were heard outside the tent.

"WE KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE, KAGURA! COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS RAISED OR WE NUKE THIS ENTIRE CARNIVAL!"

Uh-oh…

Sesshomaru had forgotten about the Peruvian officials. Now was too late, he quickly picked up Rin and made a mad dash for the exit while blaring lights flashed on the canvas covers of the tent.

Sesshomaru caught Inuyasha's and his flea bitten brother nodded. They didn't get along, but they could still understand each other.

Grabbing the Ball's hand, he dragged her, leading her after Sesshomaru and Rin. Even without looking back, he could sense Miroku was behind him. Or maybe it was because of the loud banshee like screams the Miroku produced whenever he was required to exercise.

"Shut up Miroku!"

He yelled it at the same time Sango did. Surprised, he looked at Sango. She was learning how to handle his unhandlable buddy.

The three couples made it to Sesshomaru's car without much mishap. They sped out of the parking lot just as helicopters started gathering over the tent where Sailor Sesshomaru had been just a few minutes before.

Silence settled over the occupants in the vehicle, until Rin spoke up.

"Tonight was fun."

Quickly, Kagome and Sango jumped in and agreed. The events of their night was the stuff of legends.

Sesshomaru dropped Miroku and Sango off at the tree house. Then waited for Kagome to exit. When she didn't budge, Inuyasha poked her.

"Move Ball."

"I need to go home Inuyasha."

The youth blinked his eyes, then scratched his ears. Had he heard right? Did she really want to get away from him that badly?

"I miss my family. They should be back by today."

Kagome was mumbling. To be honest with herself, she liked spending time at the tree house. It was exciting and more fun than she had ever had in a while. But at the same time, a part of her longed for her family.

Inuyasha stared at the girl sitting next to him. What was he going to do? He wanted her to stay with him, that much was true. It was outrageously hilarious riling her up, but he could see that she really did want to go home.

Quickly, before she hand time to react, he pinned her to the seat of the car and whispered quietly in her ear, "Go home, but don't forget you belong to me."

His warm breath sent shivers running down Kagome's spine.

"Don't make out in my car brat."

Inuyasha took a half hearted swing at his older brother then exited the vehicle.

Kagome was still frozen in the same spot, hugging her cow plushie tightly. She had forgotten how strong and dangerous Inuyasha could be. If he wanted, he could easily force her to come back with him…yet he let her go. Was there more to him than met the eye?

"Where to?"

Sesshomaru's short question brought her out of her thoughts and as she gave directions to her family shrine, she sat back in the leather seats, turning everything Inuyasha had ever done to her in her mind…

Saving her from when she was about to drown, being her fluffly pillow when she was cold, burping in her face, comforting her when she was afraid of the storm, yelling at his weird friend when he poked her with a needle on her pressure point, winning the cow plushie for her, saying thank you when she won him the food…

All the memories floated to the top of her mind, and a bigger question appeared. How did she feel about Inuyasha?

He annoyed the life and soul out of her, but it couldn't be denied that she cared about him. But to what extent? What did he mean to her?

Thanking Sesshomaru who gave her a curt nod, Kagome climbed the steps to her home. Walking inside, she flipped on the lights. When no Souta came charging down the stairs to greet her, or Grandpa with his charms and spells, she suddenly remembered that they were on vacation.

Sighing, she was about to head up to her room when the beeping red light on the answering machine caught her eye.

"Kagome, I forgot to tell you before we left, a friend of yours called and asked if he could stay with us for a few weeks. He's supposedly here on business and should arrive tonight. I want you to be nice to him and don't burn his toothbrush."

Kagome frowned slightly when her mom's voice clicked off. That was unusual… She didn't know of any friends who lived far away…

Glancing up at the clock that read 10 thirty, Kagome shrugged. Now was too late to worry about it. If they haven't shown up yet, maybe the person got lost… or forgot.

Climbing the stairs, Kagome headed for her room. Sighing tiredly, she flicked on her light switch and was greeted by a male standing in her room, looking at the pictures on her dresser.

At her entrance, the male turned and gave Kagome, who was frozen to the ground a smile.

"It's been a long time Kagome."

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AN: Yes, I left off with a cliffie! But this is the longest chapter in this entire story so far! XD Its to apologize for the 2 year update. I really am sorry about that. I didn't mean to give up on it…XD So for those who still read this story. I'm back and hopefully will update again before the end of the year.

And for those who are wondering, I know we've reached 400 reviews, and I'm working on getting the Inuyasha interview up, but it would be nice… to get 500 reviews too…XD (ish a greedy little llama)

DraGonMistress704 – Lolz! I claim fluffly sama! rin pops up looking murderous

Liz – Thank you! I updated… but two years later…XD

Evilchich – NOOOO! I SHALL STOP YOU! FEAR MEEEEE!

Prepare For I Am The Sugar - I'm sorry! XDI replied this time! And with LOVE! My name is neither… I'm called Cathy :D

Jersey – Thank you! The next chapter is finally up if you're still reading this.

KrypticInsanity3 – Thank you! I'm so sorry you had to wait two years for it…XD

Phalliwell – Updated at long last… I apologize…XD

I love koga! – Lolz, none taken. Thank you!

Anna – I updated! DON'T SHOOT ME!


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